Afterwards Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Here`s an essay on "The Cow" which was actually written a some student in the course of completing the "Indian Civil Services Examination". Calcutta`s Telegraph got hold of an answer paper of a candidate at the recent UPSC examinations and here it is...
    The cow is a successful animal. Also he is quadruped, and because he is female, he give milk, but will do so when he is got child. He is same like God, sacred to Hindus and useful to man. But he has got four legs together. Two are forward and two are afterwards.
    "His whole body can be utilized for use. More so the milk. What can it do? Various ghee, butter, cream, curd, why and the condensed milk and so forth. Also he is useful to cobbler, watermen and mankind generally.
    "His motion is slow only because he is of latitudinous species. Also his other motion is much useful to trees, plants as well as making flat cakes in hand and drying in the sun. Cow is the only animal that extricates his more...

    A man on a business trip in Mexico decides to take in a bull fight. After the event, he stops in to the little dive next to the venue called "The Matador".
    As he checks out the menu trying to decide what he wants he sees a waiter bring a dish to another customer.
    The dish is spaghetti with these two huge meat balls. When the waiter comes to his table, he inquires. "That is the Matador Special" replies the waiter. "Spaghetti and Bull testicles. We get them after the bull fight. It is exquisite!"
    "That's what I'll have!", says the businessman.
    "I'm very sorry senor, but that dish is only available once per day".
    Disappointed, the man orders another dish and plans to try again the next day.
    So again, the next day he goes to the bull fights, and afterwards stops into the dive. Just as the waiter is coming to his table, he sees another waiter bringing the "Matador Special" to another customer who was more...

    The bride tells her husband, "Honey, you know I'm a virgin and I don't know
    anything about sex. Can you explain it to me first?"

    "OK, Sweetheart. Putting it simply, we will call your private place' the
    prison' and call my private thing' the prisoner'. So what we do is: put the
    prisoner in the prison.

    And then they made love for the first time.

    Afterwards, the guy is lying face up on the bed, smiling with satisfaction.

    Nudging him, his bride giggles, "Honey the prisoner seems to have escaped."

    Turning on his side, he smiles. "Then we will have to re-imprison him."

    After the second time they spent, the guy reaches for his cigarettes but
    the girl, thoroughly enjoying the new experience of making love, gives him
    a suggestive smile, "Honey, the prisoner is out again!"

    The man rises to the occasion, but with the unsteady legs of a more...

    This is a true essay written by a Bihari candidate at
    the UPSC(IAS)Examinations. candidate has written an essay on the Indian cow
    You will forget your English by the time you finish
    reading this.
    Indian Cow
    HE IS THE COW. "The cow is a successful animal. Also he is 4 footed, And because he is female, he give milks, [ but will do so when he is got child.] He is same like God, sacred to Hindus and useful to man.
    But he has got four legs together. Two are forward and two are afterwards.
    His whole body can be utilised for use. More so the
    milk. Milk comes from 4 taps attached to his basement. [ horses dont have any such
    attachment ]
    What can it do? Various butter, cream, curd, why
    and the condensed milk and so forth. Also he is useful to cobbler, watermans and mankind generally.
    His motion is slow only because he is of lazy
    species.Also his other motion.. [from the backyard] is much
    useful to trees, plants as well as for making more...

    HE IS THE COW. "The cow is a successful animal. Also he is 4 footed,
    And because he is female, he give milks, [ but will do so when he is
    got child.] He is sacred to Hindus and useful to man. But he has got
    four legs together. Two are forward and two are afterwards. His whole
    body can be utilised for use. More so the milk. Milk comes from 4
    taps attached to his basement. [ horses dont have any such
    attachment]

    What can it do? Various ghee, butter, cream, curd, why and the
    condensed milk and so forth. Also he is useful to cobbler, watermans
    and mankind generally. His motion is slow only because he is of lazy
    species. Also his other motion.. gober] is much useful to trees,
    plants as well as for making flat cakes[like Pizza ], in hand, and
    drying in the sun. Cow is the only animal that extricates his feeding
    after eating. Then afterwards she chew with his teeth whom are
    situated in the inside of the mouth. more...

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