Ants Jokes / Recent Jokes

How do ants hide from aardvarks? They disguise themselves as uncles!

How many ants are needed to fill an apartment?
Ten ants!

It was a boring Sunday afternoon in the jungle, so the Elephants decided to challenge the Ants to a game of soccer. The game was going well with the Elephants beating the Ants ten goals to nil, when the Ants gained possession.
The Ants' star player was dribbling the ball towards the Elephants' goal when the Elephants' left back came lumbering towards him. The elephant trod on the little ant, killing him instantly.The referee stopped the game. "What the hell do you think you're doing? Do you call that sportsmanship, killing another player?"The elephant replied, "Well, I didn't mean to kill him - I was just trying to trip him up."

It was a boring Sunday afternoon in the jungle so the Elephants decided to challenge the Ants to a game of soccer. The game was going well with the Elephants beating the Ants ten goals to nil, when the Ants gained possession. The Ants star player was dribbling the ball towards the Elephants goal when the Elephants left back came lumbering towards him. The elephant trod on the little ant, killing him instantly. The referee stopped the game. "What the hell do you think youre doing? Do you call that sportsmanship, killing another player?" The elephant replied, "Well, I didnt mean to kill him -- I was just trying to trip him up."

The teacher was giving her class of seven-year-olds a natural history lesson. "Worker ants," she told them, "can carry pieces of food five times their own weight. What do you conclude from that?"One child was ready with the answer: "They don't have a union."

Beijing (Reuter, 1/26) - China's official Xinhua news agency, which announced this week that maggot extract is a good source of nutrition, urged people Thursday to add ants to their diet with a set of recipes cooked up by a professor. Wu Zhicheng, "an expert on ant diet" based in the central city of Nanjing, has worked out dozens of recipes for ant-based cakes, teas and wines in an effort to promote ant eating, it said. "Ants are a miniature nutritious treasury," Xinhua quoted Wu as saying, adding that ants contained more zinc than either soybeans or pig liver. Xinhua said Chinese have been eating ants for more than 3, 000 years and "the longevity of many old people who are now over 100 years old has been found to be connected with an ant diet." The edible ant suggestion follows Xinhua's report Saturday that announced a scientific team had worked out a way to develop maggots as a "huge new source of nourishment for the 1990s." "Maggot more...

Where do ants go for their holidays? Frants!