Asses Jokes / Recent Jokes

A bus stops and two obviously Italian men get on. They seat themselves, and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following: "Emma come first. Den I come. Two asses, they come together. I come again. Two asses, they come together again. I pee twice. Then I come once more." "You foul-mouthed wop swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!" "Hey, cool down lady," said the man. "I was only tellin' my friend here how to spell Mississippi."

A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves andengage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind themignores their conversation at first, but her attention isgalvanized when she hears one of the men saying the following;"Emma come first. Denna I come. Two asses, they come together. I come again. Two asses, they come together again. I come againand pee twice. Denna I come once-a more." "You fowl-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "Inthis country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!"Hey, coola down lady," said the man, "Imma justa tellun myfriend howa to spella Mississippi."

A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men saying the following;"Emma come first. Denna I come. Two asses, they come together. I come again. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Denna I come once-a more." "You fowl-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!"Hey, coola down lady," said the man, "Imma justa tellun my friend howa to spella Mississippi."

A BUS STOPS AND 2 ITALIAN MEN GET ON. THEY SEAT THEMSELVES AND ENGAGE IN AN ANIMATED CONVERSATION. THE LADY SITTING BEHIND THEM IGNORES THEIR CONVERSATION AT FIRST, BUT SHE LISTENS IN HORROR AS ONE OF THE MEN SAYS THE FOLLOWING:
"EMMA COME FIRST. DEN I COME. TWO ASSES, DEY COME TOGETHER. I COME AGAIN. TWO ASSES, DEY COME TOGETHER AGAIN. I COME AGAIN AND PEE TWICE. DEN I COME ONCE-A MORE!"
"YOU FOUL-MOUTHED SWINE!" RETORTED THE LADY INDIGNANTLY..."IN THIS COUNTRY WE DO NOT TALK ABOUT OUR SEX LIVES IN PUBLIC!!!"
"HEY, COOLA DOWN LADY" SAID THE MAN. "IMMA JUST TELLUN MY FRIEND HOW TO SPELL MISSISSIPPI!"

A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:
"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time."
"You foul-mouthed sex obsessed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country....we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives.........
"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sexa? I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella' Mississippi'."

A man much harassed by his wife took his four-year-old son to a zoo to escape nagging at home. They came to an enclosure where a donkey was grazing. "Papa, what is this animal?" asked the boy.
"This son, is an ass."
The next enclosure had a she donkey. "And what is this?" asked the child.
"This son, is the wife of an ass."
"Papa, do asses also get married?"
"Han beta," replied his Sire, "Sirf gadhey hee shaddi kartey hain- only donkeys get married."

A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first but her attention is galvanised when she hears one of them say the following:
"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses they come together again. I come aain and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time."
"You foul-mouthed, sex-obsessed swine," says the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives.
"Hey coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin'abouta sex? I'm justa tellin' my frienda how to spell Mississippi.