Astrologer Jokes / Recent Jokes

A medieval astrologer prophesied to a king that his favorite mistress would soon die. Sure enough, the woman died a short time later.
The king was outraged at the astrologer, certain that his prophecy had brought about the woman's death. He summoned the astrologer and commanded him, "Tell me when you will die!"
The astrologer realized that the king was planning to kill him immediately, no matter what answer he gave. "I do not know when I will die," he answered finally. "I only know that when I die, you will die two days later."

An econometrician and an astrologer are arguing about their subjects.The astrologer says, "Astrology is more scientific. My predictions come out right half the time. Yours can't even reach that proportion".The econometrician replies, "That's because of external shocks. Stars don't have those".

An econometrician and an astrologer are arguing about their subjects. The astrologer says, “Astrology is more scientific. My predictions come out right half the time. Yours can’t even reach that proportion”. The econometrician replies, “That’s because of external shocks. Stars don’t have those”.

An econometrician and an astrologer are arguing about their subjects.
The astrologer says, "Astrology is more scientific. My predictions come out right half the time. Yours can't even reach that proportion".
The econometrician replies, "That's because of external shocks. Stars don't have those".

A frog went to an astrologer and was told, “you are going to meet a beautiful young woman who will want to know everything about you. ”
The frog said, “that’s great! Will i meet her at a party, or what? ”
“no”, said the astrologer, “next term-in her biology class. ”