Avraham Jokes

The thinker.
After months of negotiation, Avraham, a Jewish scholar from Odessa, was granted permission to visit Moscow.
He boarded the train and sat down. At the next stop a young man got on and sat next to him. Avraham looked at the young man and thought, This fellow doesn`t look like a peasant, and if he isn`t a peasant he probably comes from this area. If he comes from this area, he must be Jewish because this is, after all, a Jewish area. On the other hand, if he is a Jew, where could he be going?
I`m the only one from our area to be allowed to travel to Moscow.
Wait - just outside Moscow there is a little village called Samvet, and you don`t need special permission to go there.
But why would he be going to Samvet? He`s probably going to visit one of the Jewish families there, but how many Jewish families are there in Samvet? Only two - the Bernsteins and the Steinbergs. The Bernsteins are a terrible family, so he must be visiting the Steinbergs.
But more...

And it came to pass after these things that G-d did test Avraham. And He said to him "Avraham!"And Avraham replied "Hineni - here I am."And He said, "Take your computer, your old computer, your 286, and install upon it an operating system, a new operating system, Windows 95, which I will show to you."And Avraham rose up early in the morning, and saddled his ass. He loaded his computer, his old computer, his 286, on the ass. And he took two of his young men with him and Yitzchak his son. And he rose up and went to the place where G-d had told him, there to find Windows 95.Then, on the third day, Avraham lifted his eyes and saw Windows 95 from afar. And Avraham said to his young men, "Stay here with the ass; and I and the lad will go yonder and load Windows 95 on our 286, and come again to you."And Avraham took his computer his old computer, his 286, and laid it on Yitzchak his son. And they went both of them together.And Yitzchak spoke to Avraham more...