Bad Kid Jokes / Recent Jokes

Did you hear about the boy who had to do a project on trains?
He had to keep track of everything!

A kid is flunking a public school, so his parents move him into a private school. All the sudden in the private school his grades skyrocket up to A's. Then one night at the dinner table his parents ask,"Why were you doing so bad in a public school, and when we switched you to a private school you did so well?" The kid responds,"because I knew they were serious about school. The first day I walked in they had a guy nailed to a plus sign."

Rich boy to dinner lady: This bread's horrible! Why can't you make your own bread like the servants do at home?
Dinner lady: Because we don't have the kind of dough that your father makes!

These two poor kids go to a birthday party at a rich kid's house. The kid is so rich that he has his own swimming pool and all the kids go in. As they're changing afterwards, one of the poor kids says to the other one, "Did you notice how small the rich kid's penises were?" "Yeah," says his mate, "It's probably because they've got toys to play with."

Ned: What does your Dad sell?
Ed: Salt.
Ned: Well, my dad is a salt seller, too.
Ed: Shake.

Mum: Haven't you finished filling the salt shaker yet?
Son: Not yet. It's really hard to get the salt through all those little holes!

A young female teacher was giving an assignment to her Grade 6 class one day. It was a large assignment so she started writing high up on the chalkboard. Suddenly there was a giggle from one of the boys in the class. She quickly turned and asked, "What's so funny Pat?" "Well teacher, I just saw one of your garters." "Get out of my classroom," she yells, "I don't want to see you for three days." The teacher turns back to the chalkboard. Realizing she had forgotten to title the assignment; she reaches to the very top of the chalkboard. Suddenly there is an even louder giggle from another male student. She quickly turns and asks, "What's so funny Billy?" "Well miss, I just saw both of your garters." Again she yells, "Get out of my classroom!" This time the punishment is more severe, "I don't want to see you for three weeks." Embarrassed and frustrated, she drops the eraser when she turns around again. So she more...