Banta Jokes / Recent Jokes

A motorcycle cop on patrol watched as Banta in a car slowed down at a stop sign, without coming to a complete stop, then sped off.
The motorcycle cop pulled the vehicle over and approached Banta.
"Sir, can I please see your license and rgistration."
Banta replies, "Not until you tell me what the heck I did wrong, Officer."
The officer explain, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign a few blocks back."
"Let me guess," said Banta, "all the wine shops are closed today!"
"Sir, I'm going to overlook that last comment. Now, if you would please show me your license and registration."
Banta counters, "Not until you tell me the difference between slowing down and coming to a complete stop."
"Sir, step out of the car."
As Banta reluctantly gets out of his car, the officer begins beating him over the head with his nightstick and exclaims, "Now, sir, would you more...

Santa, And Banta, a beautiful girl and an old woman are sitting in a train in Europe. The train suddenly goes thru a tunnel and. .. it gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. The woman and the Banta are sitting there looking perplexed. The Santa is bent over holding his face which is red from an apparent slap. The old woman is thinking: That Santa must have tried to kiss that girl and has got slapped. The Santa is thinking: `Damn it, that Banta

Banta has a cross-eyed bull that keeps bumping into things. He calls up to vet to try to remedy the problem.
The vet says, "I think the best thing is to stick a pipe up his ass and blow real hard and the bulls` eyes will straighten out."
The vet - a 70 year old man - inserts the pipe and blows. The bulls` eyes begin to straighten, but the vet soon looses his breath and the bulls` eyes are crossed again. The vet gives it another try, but looses his breath again.
The vet looks at Banta and says, "You look like a strong man, why don`t you give it a try."
Banta agrees. He then takes the pipe out of the bulls` ass, turns it around, and sticks it back in. He then begins to blow.
"Shit!!!" says the vet. "What in the hell did you do that for?"
Banta replies, "You don`t think I am going to put my mouth on the same end of the pipe that you had your on."

Banta Singh: "Er, is that Air-India office? Can you tell me how long it takes to fly from Delhi to Bombay?" Booking clerk: "Just a minute, Sir..." Banta: "O. K. Thanks a lot." And he hangs up.

A foursome, including Banta, goes out on the course, only to find themselves waiting on every hole for the most inept golfers they've ever seen, who are playing in front of them.
After a few holes, they start yelling them, but that doesn't seem to speed their game up. By the time they've finished their round, they're so pissed off that they go straight to the golf pro to complain.
"Guys," he tells them, "those fellow you've been screaming at and taunting for the last three hours are blind".
"You're telling us," one of the irate foursome says.
"No, I meant it," the pro says, they're really blind. They're trying to overcome their handicap by participating in sports."
Now embarrassed, the first of the foursome says to the pro, "When they come in, fix them up with new golfers shoes, and put it on my tab."
The second guy adds, "And give them each a new set of club covers and put on my tab."
The more...

Banta was not home at his usual hour, and his wife, Preeto, was fuming, as the clock ticked later and later. Finally, about 3: 00 AM she heard a noise at the front door, and as she stood at the top of the stairs, there was Banta, drunk as a skunk, trying to navigate the stairs.
"Do you realize what time it is?" she asked.
He answered, "Don`t get excited. I`m late because I bought something for the house."
Immediately her attitude changed, and as she ran down the stairs to meet him halfway, she asked, "What did you buy for the house, dear?"
Banta`s answer was, "A round of drinks!"

"How did it happen?" the doctor asked Banta as he set the Banta's broken leg.
"Well, doctor, 15 years ago..."
"Never mind the past! Tell me how you broke your leg this morning."
"Like I was saying... 15 years ago, when I first started working on the farm, that night, right after I'd gone to bed, the farmer's beautiful daughter came into my room. She asked me if there was anything I wanted.
I said, "No, everything is fine."
"Are you sure?" she asked.
"I'm sure," I said.
"Isn't there anything I can do for you???" she wanted to know.
"I reckon not," I replied.
"Excuse me," said the doctor, "What the hell does this story have to do with your broken leg?!?!?"
"Well, this morning," Banta explained, "when it dawned on me what she meant, I fell off the roof!"