Banta Jokes / Recent Jokes
Banta Singh happened to be in a queue at a railway
station ticket counter with two men ahead of him.
Ek Punjab Mail dena.` demanded the man in front.
He was given a ticket.
`Ek Punjab Mail dena.` the second man asked and was
handed a ticket.
Then came the turn of Banta Singh,
`Ek Punjab female dena!`
`What do u mean by Punjab female?` asked the clerk.
`It is for my wife` replied Banta Singh.
Banta called his friend Santa and told him that he recently met the woman of his dreams. Now what should he do? Santa said, Send her some flowers and on the card invite her for a home-cooked meal. Banta liked the idea, so he invited the woman. The day after the meal Santa calls Banta and asks about the meal. Banta, It was a flop idea. Santa, Didn’t the girl come to your house? Banta, She did, but she refused to cook!
One Day Santa And Banta Were T Talking Santa: How Many Seconds Are There In A Year Banta: 12 Santa: How Banta: Jan 2, Feb 2, March 2, April 2, May 2, June 2, July 2, Aug 2, Sept 2, Oct 2, Nov 2 And Dec 2
After just a few years of marriage, filled with constant arguments, Banta and his wife Preeto decided the only way to save their marriage was to try counseling. They had been at each others throats for some time and felt that this was their last straw.
When they arrived at the counselor`s office, the counselor jumped right in and opened the floor for discussion.
"What seems to be the problem?"
Immediately, Banta held his long face down without anything to say. On the other hand, Preeto began talking 90 miles an hour describing all the wrongs within their marriage.
After 10-15 minutes of listening to the wife, the counselor went over to her, picked her up by her shoulders, kissed her passionately for several minutes, and sat her back down.
Afterwards, Preeto sat there - speechless. He looked over at Banta who was staring in disbelief at what had happened.
The counselor spoke to Banta, "Your wife NEEDS that at least twice a more...
Banta owned a pub in the Ludhiana, and in the summertime a swarm of flies seemed to just hover over the buffet table. This had been going on for about a month.
Santa, the neighborhood mooch, walked in one day.
"I`m not giving you another free beer!" Banta hollered, as he noticed Santa.
Santa was not without a plan, however. He approached Banta and offered him a deal.
"I`ve been noticing these flies for the last weeks. If you`ll give me a shot, I`ll kill every one of them for you."
Banta gave him the agreed-upon shot. Once he had downed it, Santa got up and headed for the door.
"All right," he shouted, "send them out - one at a time!"
Banta`s driving along the highway one evening when all of a sudden nature calls. He sees a little bar up the way and he pulls into the parking lot.
When he gets inside, he finds the place is packed! The bar is crowded with people trying to get drinks, ladies are dancing on the tables and there`s hardly standing room anywhere.
Banta scans the place a couple of times to find the restrooms, but to no avail. Finally, he spots a small stairway and scrambles up.
When he gets to the top, he discovers that all the doors are locked. All but one. When he opens the door, all he sees is a big hole in the floor. Desperate, he drops his pants and dumps the biggest load he`s ever had right there in the hole.
Relieved, he calmly walks down the stairs. The once crowded barroom is completely empty, not a soul was in sight. Slowly, a bartender rises from behind the bar.
"What happened!?!" says Banta.
The bartender responds "Where were you when the shit hit more...
Banta was driving back from Shimla when there was a terrible hailstorm. Huge hailstones the size of tennis balls pelted his car leaving it full of dents.
He drove to the nearby automotive center and asked what he should do. The mechanic explained what needed to be done and that it would cost at least Rs 5, 000 to repair. Banta said that was too much and asked if there was some other way to fix it.
He decided to have a little fun and said, "Well you could blow into the tail pipe real hard and they might pop back out."
Banta decided to give it a try before spending that much money. He drove home and was in the garage with his lips wrapped around the exhaust pipe when his neighbour Santa came over to visit.
"What are you doing?" asked Santa.
"I`m blowing into the tailpipe real hard to pop all these dents out of my car," explained Banta.
"Well silly, it`s not going to work," replied Santa.
"Why not?" more...