Banta Jokes / Recent Jokes

Banta: u looked troubled, what’s your problem?
Santa: i’m going to be a father
Banta: but, that's wonderful
Santa: what's wonderful! My wife doesn't know about it yet

Banta wanted to get his beautiful wife, Preeto, something nice for their first wedding anniversary. So he decided to buy her a cell phone.
He showed her the phone and explained to her all of its features.
Preeto was excited to receive the gift and simply adored her new phone.
The next day Preeto went shopping. Her phone rang and, to her astonishment, it was Banta on the other end.
"Hi Preeto," he said, "how do you like your new phone?"
Preeto replied, "I just love it! It`s so small and your voice is clear as a bell, but there`s one thing I don`t understand though..."!
"What`s that, sweetie?" asked Banta.
"How did you know I was at Sukhna Lake?"

Santa, Banta and one of their friends are patients in a mental institution and are preparing for an examination given by the head psychiatrist. If they pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for five years.
The doctor takes them to the top of a diving board looking over an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump.
The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms.
Then Banta jumps and breaks both legs.
Santa looks over the side and refuses to jump.
“Congratulations! You`re a free man. Just tell me why didn`t you jump? ” asked the doctor.
To which Santa answered, “Well Doc, I can`t swim! ”

Santa had asked Banta to help him out with the deck after work,
so Banta just went straight over to Santa's place. When they got to
the door, Santa went straight to his wife, gave her a hug and told her how beautiful she was and how much he had missed her at work. When it was time for supper, he complimented his wife on her cooking, kissed her and told her how much he loved her.
Once they were working on the deck, Banta told Santa that he was surprised that he fussed so much over his wife. Santa said that he'd started this about 6 months ago, it had revived their marriage, and things couldn't be better. Banta thought he'd give it a go. When he got home, he gave his wife a massive hug, kissed her and told her that he loved her.
His wife burst into tears.
Banta was confused and asked why she was crying. She said, "This is the worst day of my life. First, little chintu fell off his bike and twisted his ankle. Then, the washing machine broke and flooded the more...

"How does Jeeto like being pregnant?" Banta asked his friend Santa.
"Oh, she's not pregnant," Santa replied, "she's expecting."
"What's the difference?" Banta pressed.
"Well, Santa explained, "She's expecting me to cook dinner, she's expecting me to do the housework, she's expecting me to rub her feet..."

On a summer holiday in New York Banta decided to visit a bar. At the bar, the man sitting on Banta's left told the bartender,' Johnie Walker, single.' Then the man on his right ordered,' Jack Daniels, single.' When the barman turned to Banta for an order, he said,' Banta, married.'

Santa had been out for a few days due to ill health. At work Banta asked him how he was feeling?
"I'm better, thanks. You know, it was a wonderful experience." he replied.
"Wonderful? How can the cold and fever be wonderful?" Banta asked Santa in stunned disbelief.
"Well, I learned that my wife, Jeeto, really loves me. You know that whenever the mailman came by or a delivery man headed toward the door, she ran out to meet them? I could hear her excitedly saying 'My husband is home! My husband is home!'"