Barry Bonds Jokes / Recent Jokes

Barry Bonds hit his 715th homer to surpass Babe Ruth on the all-time home run list. In contrast, the guy who almost caught the prized ball, only to lose it to a guy waiting in line for hot dogs, went home and hit his wife and kids 716 times.

Rumors around Hollywood are speculating on a movie version of Game of Shadows. Due to Barry Bonds’ change in size over the years, multiple actors will have to play the slugger. Michael Clarke Duncan will appear as the current Bonds, while a younger Barry Bonds will be played by Dave Chappelle. Bonds five years from now will be played by one of the statues from Easter Island.

Barry Bonds underwent elbow surgery to remove bone chips and hypodermic needles. Next week, Bonds is scheduled to have surgery to drain all the cantaloupe juice from his over-sized melon head.

Barry Bonds' wife has filed for legal separation. Soon even his marriage will have an asterisk attached to it.

Rosie Perez's new film about her family and the history of Puerto Rico will air on the IFC network. The title of the film is, "Yo soy Boriqua, Pa' que lo Sepas!"

Translation: I'm Puerto Rican, so you know!
Wow! Now that's an eye-opener! Who knew that she would turn out to be Puerto Rican. I just thought she was the greatest Swedish actress in the world.
Other documentaries in the works:
With Barry Bonds, "I'm a Baseball Player, I Took Steroids, so you Know!"
With Michael Jackson, "I'm a Singer, I Really like Kids, so you Know!"
With George W. Bush, "I'm the President, so I Think!"

New documents prove that Barry Bonds tested positive for steroids four times between 2000 and 2003. This is the only time news concerning Barry Bonds will ever be positive.