Birthday Jokes / Recent Jokes

A blonde was trying to bake a cake for her boyfriend’s birthday. She went through six boxes of cake mix just trying to bake this cake.
She was very frustrated because every time she put the cake in the oven, the candles melted!

A fellow was very much in love with a beautiful girl. One day she told him that the next day was her birthday. He told her he would send her a bouquet of roses… one for each year of her life.
That evening he called the local florist and ordered twenty-one roses with instructions that they be delivered first thing the next morning.
As the florist was preparing the order, he decided that since the young man was such a good customer, he would put an extra dozen roses in the bouquet.
The fellow never did find out what made the young girl so angry with him.

One day a blonde went into a restaurant and decided she was going to order the free birthday dessert, even though it wasn't her birthday.
A month later on her real birthday she went back to the restaurant with her family, and they had the same waiter.
She ordered the dessert again and the waiter recognized her.
This was her excuse:
"Oh that wasn't me that was my twin sister."
Let's just say she wasn't going back anytime soon.

"I guess I didnt get my birthday wish." "How do you know?" "Youre still here!"

A couple had been debating buying a vehicle for weeks. He wanted a truck and she wanted a fast little sports car so she could zip through traffic around town.He would probably have settled on any beat up old truck, but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price range. "Look!" she said, "I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in just a few seconds. My birthday is coming up so surprise me!"He did just that.For her birthday he bought her a brand new bathroom scale.Nobody has seen or heard from him since.

Good news! Ive been given a goldfish for my birthday.. . the bad news is that I dont get the bowl until my next birthday!

On a man's 33rd birthday he gets a package at the Post Office and goes to collect it.
At the counter the woman brings his package to him, and the man says, "It's my birthday today."
"Oh, happy birthday, how old are you?", asks the Post Office worker.
"33.", says the man.
"Well, have a good day.", says the worker.
"Thank you.", replied the man.
To get home, the man has to take the bus. At the bus stop an old lady walks up and waits soon after he arrives.
The man says to the old lady,
"It's my birthday today."
"Oh, happy birthday.", says the old lady.
"I'm..."
"No don't tell me.", interjects the old lady, "I know a unique way of telling how old somebody is."
"Oh yeah? What's that then?", asks the man.
"If I can feel your balls for about 5 minutes, I can tell exactly how many years old you are.", says the old more...