Blond Jokes / Recent Jokes
how do you confuse a blond?
put them in a circular room and tell them to sit in the corner
How do you confuse a blond? You don't, they're born that way.
A blond goes into a pizza shop for a snack. She orders, "May I have a veggie pizza slice with all the works?"
The worker says, "That would be our combo pizza."
The blond says, "No, thanks. I'll stay with the veggie slice."
An exhausted looking blond dragged himself in to the doctor's office. "Doctor, there are dogs all over my neighborhood. They bark all day and all night, and I can't get a wink of sleep."
"I have good news for you," the doctor answered, rummaging through a drawer full of sample medications. "Here are some new sleeping pills that work like a dream. A few of these and your trouble will be over."
"Great," the blond answered, "I'll try anything. Let's give it a shot."
A few weeks later the blond returned, looking worse than ever. "Doc, your plan is no good. I'm more tired than before!"
"I don't understand how that could be", said the doctor, shaking his head. "Those are the strongest pills on the market!"
"That may be true," answered the blond wearily, "but I'm still up all night chasing those dogs and when I finally catch one it's hard getting him to swallow the more...
After being married 25 years, one day I took a look at my wife and said, "Honey, do you realize 25 years ago, I had a cheap apartment, a cheap car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10 inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 25 year old blond. Now, we have a nice house, nice car, big bed and plasma screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 50 year old Woman. It seems to me that you are not holding up your side of things."
Now my wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 25 year old blond, and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, sleeping on a sofa bed....
I shut up and took out the trash.
81. Q: What do you call a hooker and four blondes? A: Regular price, four bucks, four bucks, four bucks, four bucks.82. Q: Why is a blonde like a door knob? A: 'Cause everybody gets a turn.83. Q: Why is a blonde like railroad tracks? A: 'Cause she's been laid all over the country.84. Q: What important question does a blonde ask his/her mate before having sex? A: Do you want this by the hour, or the flat rate? 85. Q: Why do blonde girls have trouble achieving orgasm? A: *Who cares?*86. Q: Why do blonds have orgasms? A: So they know when to stop having sex ! 87. Q: How do you tell when a blonde reaches orgasm??? A1: She drops her nail-file!!! A2: Who cares? A3: She say 'Next' A4: The next person in the queue taps you on the shoulder A5: He's had his clothes for about 2 minutes A6: The batteries have run out.88. Q: Why don't blondes call 911 in an emergency? A1: They can't remember the number. A2: She can't find the number 11 on the telephone buttons.89. Q: What does a blonde say when more...