Bombing Jokes

Q: What is the difference between the Dresden bombing and Germany's best comedian? A: Only the first one can make you smile.

Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate-the bombs always hit the ground.

A Pinoy went to a bar in Hawaii to have some drinks. At the counter, he sat next to the famous Hollywood director, Steven Spielberg who was already ahead by a quart of alcohol.

After a couple of beers, the Pinoy sensed that Spielberg was glaring at him. Suddenly, in a flash the Pinoy crashed down from his stool, felled by a vicious hook from the director.

Picking himself up, he yelled, "Wat da hell is dat por?"

Spielberg ranted: "That's for the bombing of Pearl Harbor, you and My dad perished in that bombing!"

"Tang Na! I am not Jafanese, you stufid Nincomfoof! I am Filipino!" exclaimed the Pinoy.

The inebriated director replied, "Yeah yeah yeah. ... Japanese, Burmese, Chinese, Vietnamese, Filipino. .. you are all the same."

Regaining his composure, the Pinoy dusted off his white pants, straightened the collar of his loud bird-of-paradise printed shirt, took his seat and ordered a more...

In WW2 Captain Saunders was wounded in battle and captured by the Germans. He was sent to a German military hospital.
On his first day in the hospital a doctor came, bearing bad news, "we have to amputate your legs."
The Captain was very sad, however he asked the doctor if his legs could be dropped in his commanders next bombing mission over Britain. The doctor asked his commander, and he said yes.
And sure enough it was dropped.
On the second day the doctor came bearing more bad news, "we have to amputate your left arm."
The Captain was sadder than before, but he asked if this could also be dropped, in the commander's next mission. The answer was yes and it was dropped.
On the third day, the doctor came bearing even more bad news, "we have to amputate your right arm."
The Captain was also sad, and he asked the arm could be dropped in the next bombing mission. The doctor replied, "NO, my commander thinks you are trying to more...

body: A Chinese man went into a bar in Hawaii to have some drinks. At the counter, he was amazed to see that he was sitting next to the famous Hollywood director, Steven Spielberg.
After a round of beer the Chinese sensed that the famous producer was glaring at him.
Suddenly, in a flash the Chinese crashed down from his stool, felled by a vicious punch from the Director.
Picking himself up, he yelled, "What the hell was that for?"
The director ranted: "That's for the bombing of Pearl Harbour, you #@&%*~! My dad perished in that bombing!"
"I am not Japanese, you stupid **~#@#!?*! I am Chinese!"
"Yeah yeah yeah... Japanese, Burmese, Chinese, you are all the same", retorted Spielberg.
Regaining his composure, the Chinese took his seat and ordered a double from the bartender.
A few seconds later, the Chinese turned around and delivered a mighty punch to the director, sending him flat onto the more...