Brien Jokes / Recent Jokes

It looks like NBC has decided to fill the "Tonight Show with ConanO'Brien" time slot for the next two weeks with...what else?...reruns ofthe Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien. Here's the Top 10 reasons NBCexecutives are making this decision:


10. They're chicken-hearted and gutless.

9. You gotta admit that lately Conan's been good for ratings.

8. Now they can cancel him.

7. Carson Daly didn't want to do his own show that early.

6. Another dumb ass NBC move so why stop now?

5. Cheap.

4. They found 10 episodes where Conan expresses his gratitude to NBC.

3. Revisiting a kindler, gentler time when Conan didn't cost them so much money.

2. Consider it an audition for the Masturbating Bear. He might get his own show on NBC.

1. The bastards always return to the scene of the crime.

It was a fine summer evening at the local pub in Dublin. The bar was about half full. In one corner two fellows sat drinking pints. One fellow asks the other "Now where are ya from, me lad?"
The second fellow replies "County Cork."
The first fellow is amazed "Why that's were I hail from too! What may be your family name, then?"
The second chap says "It be none other than O'Brien"
"Why that is my clan, too. What a small world. And to what school did you go?"
"I went to St. Brigits."
"My God, So did I!!" exclaimed the first fellow loudly.
"So then, in what fine year did you graduate?"
"1954" "Incredible, so did I!..."
The local bobby (are they called that in Ireland?) stopped in around then to say hello to the bartender. "Every thing OK, Michael?"
"Yes," the bartender replied, "things are pretty normal - the O'Brien wins are more...

Brien's First Law: At some time in the life cycle of virtually every organization, its ability to succeed in spite of itself runs out.

"Convicted felon Martha Stewart met with her probation officer yesterday. She even had to give a urine sample, in which she tested positive for nutmeg." -Jimmy Kimmel
"Martha Stewart published her recipe for disaster -- mix one part arrogance with two parts incompetence, simmer in the juices and then serve hot in the can." -Jay Leno
"Tough times for Martha Stewart. Yesterday, Martha Stewart reported to her parole officer and had to take a mandatory urine test for cocaine and marijuana. Martha was found to be drug-free and her urine was found to be a lovely yellow saffron." -Conan O'Brien
"Martha Stewart was convicted of four counts of lying and obstruction of justice and could serve up to 20 years in Congress." -Craig Kilborn
"Martha Stewart was found guilty on all charges. You know what that means, stripes are in this year." -Jay Leno
"Earlier today, the jury at the Martha Stewart trial reached a verdict. more...

It was a fine summer evening at the local pub in Dublin. The bar was about half full. In one corner two fellows sat drinking pints. One fellow asks the other "Now where are ya from, me lad?"
The second fellow replies "County Cork."
The first fellow is amazed "Why that's were I hail from too! What may be your family name, then?"
The second chap says "It be none other than O'Brien"
"Why that is my clan, too. What a small world. And to what school did you go?"
"I went to St. Brigits."
"My God, So did I!!" exclaimed the first fellow loudly.
"So then, in what fine year did you graduate?"
"1954"
"Incredible, so did I!..."
The local bobby (are they called that in Ireland?) stopped in around then to say hello to the bartender. "Every thing OK, Michael?"
"Yes," the bartender replied, "things are pretty normal - the more...