Brien Jokes

O'Brien walked into a bar and ordered martini after martini, each time removing the olives and placing them in a jar. When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed, the Irishman started to leave.

"S' cuse me", said a customer, who was puzzled over what O'Brien had done, "what was that all about?"

"Nothin', said the Irishman, "my wife just sent me out for a jar of olives!"

It was a fine summer evening at the local pub in Dublin. The bar was about half full. In one corner two fellows sat drinking pints. One fellow asks the other "Now where are ya from, me lad?"
The second fellow replies "County Cork."
The first fellow is amazed "Why that's were I hail from too! What may be your family name, then?"
The second chap says "It be none other than O'Brien"
"Why that is my clan, too. What a small world. And to what school did you go?"
"I went to St. Brigits."
"My God, So did I!!" exclaimed the first fellow loudly.
"So then, in what fine year did you graduate?"
"1954"
"Incredible, so did I!..."
The local bobby (are they called that in Ireland?) stopped in around then to say hello to the bartender. "Every thing OK, Michael?"
"Yes," the bartender replied, "things are pretty normal - the more...

It was a fine summer evening at the local pub in Dublin. The bar was about half full. In one corner two fellows sat drinking pints. One fellow asks the other "Now where are ya from, me lad?"
The second fellow replies "County Cork."
The first fellow is amazed "Why that's were I hail from too! What may be your family name, then?"
The second chap says "It be none other than O'Brien"
"Why that is my clan, too. What a small world. And to what school did you go?"
"I went to St. Brigits."
"My God, So did I!!" exclaimed the first fellow loudly.
"So then, in what fine year did you graduate?"
"1954" "Incredible, so did I!..."
The local bobby (are they called that in Ireland?) stopped in around then to say hello to the bartender. "Every thing OK, Michael?"
"Yes," the bartender replied, "things are pretty normal - the O'Brien wins are more...

Brien's First Law: At some time in the life cycle of virtually every organization, its ability to succeed in spite of itself runs out.

"Convicted felon Martha Stewart met with her probation officer yesterday. She even had to give a urine sample, in which she tested positive for nutmeg." -Jimmy Kimmel
"Martha Stewart published her recipe for disaster -- mix one part arrogance with two parts incompetence, simmer in the juices and then serve hot in the can." -Jay Leno
"Tough times for Martha Stewart. Yesterday, Martha Stewart reported to her parole officer and had to take a mandatory urine test for cocaine and marijuana. Martha was found to be drug-free and her urine was found to be a lovely yellow saffron." -Conan O'Brien
"Martha Stewart was convicted of four counts of lying and obstruction of justice and could serve up to 20 years in Congress." -Craig Kilborn
"Martha Stewart was found guilty on all charges. You know what that means, stripes are in this year." -Jay Leno
"Earlier today, the jury at the Martha Stewart trial reached a verdict. more...