Bush Jokes / Recent Jokes

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George Bush: "Condoleeza! Nice to see you. What's happening?" Condoleeza Rice: "Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China."
George: "Great. Lay it on me."
Condoleeza: "'Hu' is the new leader of China."
George: "That's what I want to know."
Condoleeza: "That's what I'm telling you."
George: "That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?"
Condoleeza: "Yes."
George: "I mean the fellow's name."
Condoleeza: "Hu."
George: "The guy in China."
Condoleeza: "Hu."
George: "The new leader of China."
Condoleeza: "Hu."
George: "The Chinaman!"
Condoleeza: "Hu is leading China."
George: "Now whaddya' asking me for?"
Condoleeza: "I'm telling you Hu is leading China."
George: "Well, I'm asking more...

Karl Rove says that President Bush would veto bills allowing expanded embryonic stem-cell research, saying "We were all an embryo at one point."
But look what happened to some of those embroys--they grew up to become Karl Rove and President Bush.

PS Is anyone looking into directing research into discovering which embryos will turn into evil douchebags?

Reacting to Federal guidelines, the State of FLORIDA, which has been highlighted as a role model for student testing by the Bush Administration's Dept. of Education, has redesigned and just released a new comprehensive test to be given to all students beginning in the spring of the 2004-2005 school year.
In response to President Bush's Federal No Child Left Behind Act, students will have to pass it to be promoted to the next grade level.
In the hopes that it will be uniformly adopted by all the states, it will be called the Federal Arithmetic and Reading Test or (FART).
All students who cannot pass a FART in the second grade will be retested in grades 3, 4, and 5 until such a time as they are capable of achieving a FART score of 80%. If a student does not successfully FART by grade 5, that student shall be placed in a separate English program, the Special Mastery Elective for Learning Language (SMELL).
If with this increased SMELL program the student cannot pass the more...

After a few days, the Lord called to Adam and said, "It is time for you and Eve to begin the process of populating the earth so I want you to kiss her."

Adam answered, "Yes Lord, but what is a kiss?" So the Lord gave a brief description to Adam who took Eve by the hand and took her to a nearby bush.

A few minutes later, Adam emerged and said, "Thank you Lord, that was enjoyable."
And the Lord replied, "Yes Adam, I thought you might enjoy that and now I`d like you to caress Eve."

And Adam said, " `What is a `caress`? So the Lord again gave Adam a brief description and Adam went behind the bush with Eve.

Quite a few minutes later, Adam returned, smiling, and said, "`Lord, that was even better than the kiss." And the Lord said, "`You`ve done well Adam. And now I want you to make love to Eve."

And Adam asked, "What is `make love` Lord?"` So the Lord again more...

Outgoing U.N. Secretary-General Kofi Annan gave a farewell address in Missouri, where the audience was packed – perhaps with people trying to get their first glimpse of a black man.

Annan chose to speak at the Truman Presidential Library to contrast the presidential styles of Harry Truman, who ended a just war using the bomb, with George W. Bush, whose war ended up just bombing.

A career statesman, Annan used judicious language in his criticism of the Bush administration. Here then is a dictionary of diplomatic doublespeak:

When Annan said, “America must not sacrifice its democratic ideals while waging war against terrorism,” he meant, “The President is a douchebag.”

When Annan said, “No nation can make itself secure by seeking supremacy over all others,” he meant, “No seriously, he’s a douchebag.”

And when Annan concluded, “The U.S. has a special responsibility to the world because it continues to have extraordinary more...

Ariel Sheron fucked Laura Bush (wife of Bush junior), after 9 months
she gave birth to a baby. Bush turned angry when came to know and raised
a logical query who did this daring act. And asked for CIA to unfold the mystry as soon as possible.
Hardly an hour a news with title Laura Bush mystry revealed, published at
CNN & BBC websites...
A website (ofcourse a muslim group) took the responsibility ..founded by Mosad & CIA.

George W. Bush is sitting in a hotel lobby, planning his speech to a group of businessmen, when a little man walks up to him. "Excuse me, Mr. Bush, but my name is Steve Case, and I'm here with an extremely important client tonight. We're going to see your speech tonight, and it would be a great help to me if, when we walk by, you could impress him by saying,' Hello, Steve'."

Bush readily agrees, and fifteen minutes later, the little man walks by, deep in conversation with his client.

Bush came up and said, "Hello, Steve."

The little man says, "Fuck off, Bush! I'm in a meeting," and keeps walking.