Bush Jokes / Recent Jokes
It was reported that during the GOP convention, to prevent Sarah Palin from pronouncing "nuclear" as "new-cu-lur," like President Bush does, the teleprompter during her speech spelled the word out phonetically. When he heard the news, Bush was proud, saying that it's innovation like this that makes the terrorists hate us so much.
A 70-year-old Texas Rancher got his hand caught in a gate while working cattle. He wrapped the hand in his bandana and drove his pickup to the doctor. While suturing the laceration, the doctor asked the old man about George W. Bush being in the White House.
The old Texan said, "Well, ya know, Bush is a 'Post Turtle.'"
Not knowing what the old man meant, the doctor asked what a Post Turtle was.
The old man looked at him and drawled, "When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a Post Turtle."
The old man saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain:
"You know he didn't get there by himself, he doesn't belong there, he can't get anything done while he's up there, and you just want to help the poor dumb bastard get down."
Ariel Sheron fucked Laura Bush (wife of Bush junior), after 9 months
she gave birth to a baby. Bush turned angry when came to know and raised
a logical query who did this daring act. And asked for CIA to unfold the mystry as soon as possible.
Hardly an hour a news with title Laura Bush mystry revealed, published at
CNN & BBC websites...
A website (ofcourse a muslim group) took the responsibility ..founded by Mossad & CIA.
Editor's note: Actually a list from the 2000 election, but what the hey...
1. I'll turn capital punishment into a new game show!
2. I promise to get cocaine off our streets: 1 kilo at a time.
3. I'll finish what Bill started -- the interns.
4. Like father, like son. You liked my dad, right?
5. Vote for the GOP, Not OPP.
6. I promise no sex scandal: just look at me.
7. New penal plan: I won't use mine!
8. Read my lips: Al Gore Sucks.
9. George W. Bush: No hang-ups. Just hangovers
10. Vote for Bush and against Common Sense.
Defense nominee wins unanimous support President Bush's nominee for defense secretary, Robert Gates got unanimous backing Tuesday from the Senate Armed Services Committee. President Bush was extremly happy and told reporters "Gates is great, just look at him. All I have to do is wind him up and he does what I say."
George W. Bush was talking to some of his advisors, and they were discussing spin control on his past drug problems.
"Dubya," said his PR guy, "We've got to know, are the rumors true about your using cocaine in college."
"It's true," replied Bush, "but it isn't my fault. My parents were rich, and I was born with a silver spoon in my nose."
One day President Bush was visiting Queen Elizabeth and she decided to take him for a tour of London in the Royal Carriage. The carriage was being pulled by six Royal Stallions and one of them suddenly passed gas. It sounded like a 21-gun salute it was so loud! The smell permeated the inside of the carriage and the Queen was totally devastated."I appoligize profusely for the terrible smell inside the carriage", she said. "Oh, that's alright", said the George, "for a minute there I thought it was the horse!"