Butter Jokes / Recent Jokes

There were 3 men working on the harbour bridge, all of a sudden the lunch signal rang, so they started to have their lunch. The 3 people were, Chinese, Irish, and an Australian. The Chinese person looked inside his sandwich and said, "Oh CRAP! If I get peanut butter sandwich again from my wife, I am going to jump off the bridge! " the Irish person looked in his sandwich and said, "Oh CRAP! If I get peanut butter and jelly sandwich from my wife again, I will jump off the bridge! " The Australian said, "Oh CRAP! Not Mortadella again, if I get this sandwich again I am going to jump off the bridge! " so the next day the Chinese person looks in his sandwich and says, "Phew, I've got a cheese sandwich! " so he eats it. The Irish person looks in his sandwich and says, "Phew, I've got a vegemite sandwich! " so he eats it. The Australian looked in his sandwich, and he jumped off the bridge. The Irish person said, "I don't understand, he more...

One day dad sent his 5 year old sun to the store for a cocker spaniel, butter and a bucket. So he goes to the pet store and says I need a cockitspanket, a what a cockitspankit, oh you must mean a cocker spaniel, yea yea sure whatever. So he goes to the store and says i need some butt, what, some but.Oh you must mean some butter.Yea yea sure whatever.So he goes to the hardware store and says I need a fucket, a what, a fucket, oh.You must mean a bucket.Yea yea sure whatever.So while hes walking outside his cocker spaniel runs away and the boy runs into this hobo and says hold my but and fucket while I get my cockitspankit.

Why did the nutty kid throw butter out of the window? He wanted to see a butterfly.

What do you call the best butter on the farm?
A goat.
What do you do when your chair breaks?
Call a chairman.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer!
What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia!

One day there were three guys, a blond a black and a brown head. these three guys worked on top of a relly high building. there wifes always packed there lunches for them. they packed them a apple a juice box and a penut butter sand witch. now these three guys got penut butter sandwitches for 2 weeks straight so one day they all made a promise that if they got penut butter sandwithces the next day they would jump and kill them selfs of the building! the next day srue anofe there was a penut butter sandwithce in each lunch box. the brown hair said let there be peace in the world and jumed of the bulding. the black hair one said same here. the blondy said hey it seems to be a trend and i promised so here it gose and he jumped. the next day the boss went to the funarils the boss said why are you cring? brown hairs wife said why did i pack him a penut butter sandwith why?
the boss gose to the black hairs funaril and see the wife crying and the boss said y r u cring? y did i pack him a more...

A guy's driving down a country road when he comes upon a sign saying "Apples - $5. 00 each." He thinks that that is a lot of money so he decides to go see what's up. He goes up to the farmer and says, "Hey, how come these apples are 5 bucks each?" The farmer replies, "They are peanut butter and jelly apples." The farmer hands him one and says, "Here, try one." So the man takes a bite out of the apple and says, "Peanut butter - that's great, but I thought you said that they were peanut butter and jelly apples." The farmer tells the man to turn it around. The man bites the other side and exclaims "son of a gun - jelly!" The man says, "These apples are great - give me some!"He gets back in his car and drives a little further down the road and then sees another sign "Apples - $10 each." Again, he pulls over, goes to the farmer and says, "Hey, what's up with these apples?" The farmer says, more...

Knock Knock Who's there! Butter! Butter who? Butter wrap up - it's cold out here!