California Jokes / Recent Jokes
A Los Angeles woman was arrested for harassing the Lakers' Luke Walton, proving that even stalkers have a third string. The woman should get off with no penalty, since it'd be pretty easy to plead insanity.
Artists. .................... Painted Desert, Arizona
Athletes. ................... Olympia Heights, Florida
Candy Makers. ............... Carmel, Indiana
College Professors. ......... University City, Missouri
Ecologists. ................. Green Bay Wisconsin
Firefighters. ............... Smokey Mountains
Fortune tellers. ............ Palm Springs, California
Geologists................... Stone Mountain, Georgia
Gossip Columnists. .......... Grapevine, Texas
Helicopter Pilots. .......... Hoover, Alabama
Home Builders. .............. New Castle, Pennsylvania
Jewelers. ................... Pearl City, Hawaii
Landscapers. ................ Garden City, Michigan
Lawyers. .................... Accident, Maryland
Loan Officers................ Fairbanks, Alaska
Lumber Jacks................. Thousand Oaks, California
Manicurists. ................ Finger Lakes, New York
Optometrists. ............... Plainview, more...
Oakland A's owner Lew Wolff is reportedly looking for a new home for his franchise. He might want to consider moving to Kansas City, since they haven't had a professional baseball team in 20 years.
John Kallam graduated with a BA in criminology and entered the U.S.
Army. He served for 20 years beginning in the late 1930's. He was
an investigator during the Nuremberg trials of Nazi war criminals,
and stayed in Germany for many years organizing civilian police forces
in the post-war era. He also wrote numerous books on criminal
justice. He retired from military service in the late 1950's at the
rank of full colonel.
Returning to Fresno, California, he began teaching criminology at what
was then Fresno State College. (Later to become the California State
University, Fresno.) His work was well respected, but after about ten
years of service, he was called to see the president of the college.
He was informed that he could no longer teach with just a bachelor's
degree. Times were changing, he was told, and the school demanded
that faculty members hold a graduate degree. Merely having 20 years
of distinguished experience was no more...
Health authorities hunting the source of a nationwide E. coli outbreak are focusing on nine California farms after discovering what could be a crucial clue: an open bag of spinach left in the refrigerator of someone sickened by the bacteria. The bag of tainted Dole baby spinach is the "smoking gun," said a California health official.
--- And we didn't even need to torture anyone to find it.
Scott Niedermayer will rejoin the Anaheim Ducks after missing the team's first 28 games. Niedermayer wasn't retiring, he just hadn't realized that the NHL season had started.
How can you tell if a California State coed is a good cook? She can get the pop tart out of the toaster in one piece.