Carat Jokes

The beautiful Executive Assistant to the president of the Chase Manhattan Bank goes on a sight-seeing tour with a very rich Taiwanese client. The client out of the blue asks her to marry him. Naturally, the secretary is quite taken aback.
However, she remembers what her boss told her. Don't reject the guy outright. So, she tries to think of a way to dissuade the businessman from wanting to marry her. So, after a few minutes, the woman says to the man, "I will only marry you under three conditions. First, I want my engagement ring to be a 75 carat diamond ring, with a matching 200 carat diamond tiara."
The Taiwanese man pauses for awhile. Then, he nods his head and says "No problem! I buy. I buy."
Realizing that her first condition was too easy, the woman says to the man, "I want you to build me a 100 room mansion in New York. As a vacation home, I want a chateau built in the middle of the best wine country in France."
The man pauses for more...

The president of Chase Manhattan Bank decides he should take a vacation/business trip. Since the president has heard how much fun Taipei is, he decides to visit the offices there. He books two tickets, one for him and one for his secretary. After his arrival in Taipei, the president receives an urgent message from headquarters that the richest man in Taiwan wants to put all his money into a Chase Manhattan account. Since the account would be quite substantial, the president decides to meet personally with the man. The next day, the president and his secretary go to meet the Taiwanese at an exclusive restaurant. Throughout the dinner, the president tries to bring up the subject of opening the new account but the prospective client only seems interested in the president's secretary. After dinner, the businessman asks the secretary to spend the rest of the evening seeing the sights in Taipei with him. Not wishing to offend the prospective client, the president orders his secretary to go more...

Shlomo and Yetta were getting ready to go out to dinner. Yetta comes out of the bedroom and says to Shlomo, “Darling, do you want me to wear this Chanel suit or shall I put on the Gucci outfit?” “What do I care?” Shlomo replies.
Yetta then asks, “Darling, shall I wear my Rolex or my Cartier watch?” “Who cares?” says Shlomo. Yetta then says to Shlomo “Darling, shall I wear my 5 carat pear or my 6 carat round diamond?” To which Shlomo responds “Hey, if you don’t get your act together, and soon, we are going to miss the Early Bird Special!”

The beautiful secretary of the president of the Chase Manhattan Bank goes to a sight-seeing tour with a very rich Taiwanese client. The client out of the blue asks her to marry him.
Naturally, the secretary is quite taken aback. However, she remembers what her boss told her; "Don't reject the guy outright." So, she tries to think of a way to dissuade the businessman from wanting to marry her.
So, after a few minutes, the woman says to the man, "I will only marry you under three conditions. First, I want my engagement ring to be a 75 carat diamond ring, with a matching 200 carat diamond tiara."
The Taiwanese man pauses for awhile. Then, he nods his head and says, "No problem! I buy. I buy."
Realizing that her first condition was too easy, the woman says to the man, "I want you to build me a 100 room mansion in New York. As a vacation home, I want a chateau built in the middle of the best wine county in France."
The man pauses more...

The beautiful secretary of the president of the Chase Manhattan Bank goes to a sight-seeing tour with a very rich Taiwanese client. The client out of the blue asks her to marry him. Naturally, the secretary is quite taken aback. However, she remembers what her boss told her; "Don't reject the guy outright." So, she tries to think of a way to dissuade the businessman from wanting to marry her. So, after a few minutes, the woman says to the man, "I will only marry you under three conditions. First, I want my engagement ring to be a 75 carat diamond ring, with a matching 200 carat diamond tiara." The Taiwanese man pauses for awhile. Then, he nods his head and says, "No problem! I buy. I buy." Realizing that her first condition was too easy, the woman says to the man, "I want you to build me a 100 room mansion in New York. As a vacation home, I want a chateau built in the middle of the best wine county in France." The man pauses for awhile. He whips more...