Cheerios Jokes / Recent Jokes
The US Food and Drug administration has sent a letter to General Mills stating that because of claims on their label, their Cheerios Whole Grain Oat cereal is promoted for conditions that cause it to be a drug.
In other news, Michael Phelps has become the new spokesman for Cheerios cereal.
Two little kids, aged six and eight, decide it's time to learn how to swear. So, the eight-year-old says to the six-year-old, "Okay, you say ass' and I'll say hell'". All excited about their plan, they troop downstairs, where their mother asks them what they'd like for breakfast." Aw, hell," says the eight-year-old, "gimme some Cheerios." His mother backhands him off the stool, sending him bawling out of the room, and turns to the younger brother. "What'll you have?" "I dunno," quavers the six-year-old, "but you can bet your ass it ain't gonna be Cheerios."
A guy walks into a drugstore operated by a prudish woman.
He asks, "Can I have a dozen condoms, miss?"
"Don't miss me, mister."
"Well then, you better make it 13."
A traveling salesman walks into a bar and sees a farmer. "Can you give
me a place to spend the night?" he asks.
"You can sleep in the barn, says the farmer, but whatever you do, don't
disturb my chicken."
The salesman thanks him and pulls a duck out of his pocket, which immediately
sits down and starts playing the piano.
"We don't allow any farm animals in here," says the bartender.
"Do you have any matches?" asks the salesman.
"Sure," says the bartender.
"Good," says the salesman, "now I can find the Mac truck and drive out."
Doing so, the salesman takes the farmer home, and goes to the barn. Once
there he sees this nest full of rice, which, for no good reason, he more...
Q: What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios?
A: "Oh look! Donut seeds!"
A 6 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom.
"You know what?" says the 6 year old. "I think it's about time we started cussing."
The 4 year old nods his head in approval. The 6 year old continues, "When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with' hell' and you say something with' ass.'" The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm.
When their mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies, "Aw, Hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios."
WHACK! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying his eyes out with his mother in hot pursuit, slapping his rear with every step. His mom locks him in his room and shouts, "You can just stay there until I let you out!"
She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks
with a stern voice, "And what more...
A 7 year old boy and his 4 year old brother are upstairs in their bed room. The 7 year old is explaining that it is high time that the two of them begin swearing. When his little brother responds enthusiastically, the 7 year old says, "When we go down stairs for breakfast this morning, I'll say "Hell" and you say "ass." The 4 year old happily agrees.
As the two boys are seating themselves at the breakfast table, their Mother walks in and asks her older son what he would like to eat for breakfast. The 7 year old replies, "Ah hell, mom, I'll just have some Cheerios."
"WHACK!" The surprised mother reacts quickly. The boy runs upstairs, bawling and rubbing his behind. With a sterner voice, the mother then asks the younger son, "And what would YOU like for breakfast?" "I don't know," the 4 year old blubbers, "but you can bet your ass it's not gonna be Cheerios."