Chief Jokes / Recent Jokes

The Indians asked their Chief in autumn if the winter was going to be cold or not.

Not really knowing an answer, the chief replies that the winter was going to be cold and that the members of the village were to collect wood to be prepared.

Being a good leader, he then went to the next phone booth and called the National Weather Service and asked, "Is this winter to be cold?" The man on the phone responded, "This winter was going to be quite cold indeed."

So the Chief went back to speed up his people to collect even more wood to be prepared. A week later he called the National Weather Service again, "Is it going to be a very cold winter?"

"Yes", the man replied, "it's going to be a very cold winter." So the Chief goes back to his people and orders them to go and find every scrap of wood they can find.

Two weeks later he calls the National Weather Service again "Are you more...

An explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of natives. Upon surveying his situation, he says quietly to himself, ''I'm screwed.''
There is a ray of light from the sky and a voice booms out: ''No you are NOT screwed. Pick up that stone in front of you and bash the head of the chief.''
So the explorer picks up the stone and proceedes to bash in the head of the chief. He is breathing heavily while standing above the lifeless body. Surrounding him are the 100 native warriors with a look of shock on their faces.
The voice booms out again: ''Okay... NOW you're screwed!''

An explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of natives. Upon surveying his situation, he says quietly to
himself, "I'm screwed."
There is a ray of light from the sky and a voice booms out: "No you are NOT screwed. Pick up that stone in front of you and bash the head of the chief."
So the explorer picks up the stone and proceedes to bash in the head of the chief. He is breathing heavily while standing above the lifeless body.
Surrounding him are the 100 native warriors with a look of shock on their faces. The voice booms out again:
"Okay... NOW you're screwed!"

The chief of staff of the US Air Force decided that he would personally intervene in the recuiting crisis affecting all of our armed services. So, he directed that a nearby Air Force base be opened and that all elgible young men and women be invited. As he and his staff were standing near an brand new F-15 Fighter, a pair of twin brothers who looked like they had just stepped off a Marine Corps recruiting poster walked up to them.
The chief of staff walked up to them, stuck out his hand and introduced himself. He looked at the first young man and asked, "Son, what skills can you bring to the Air Force?"
The young man looks at him and says, "I'm a pilot!"
The general gets all excited, turns to his aide and says, "Get him in today, all the paper work done, everything, do it!" The aide hustles the young man off.
The general looks at the second young man and asked,"What skills to you bring to the Air Force?"
The young man says, more...

America And Intellegent Were Best Friends. Once A Chief Guest Came In Their School. America Said: When The Chief Guest Will
Come I Will Hide In The Bathroom. Next Day The Chief Guest Came Chief Guest: Who Is Intellegent Here? Intellgent Thinks
Chief Guest Is Calling Him. He Raises His Hand. Chief Guest Says: Tell Me Where Is America? Intellgent Says: Sir America Is
In The Bathroom. Chief Guest Thinks:????????????

An explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of natives. Upon surveying the situation, he says quietly to himself "Oh God, I'm screwed!!!."
There is a ray of light from heaven and a voice booms out: "No, you are NOT screwed. Pick up that stone at your feet and bash in the head of the chief standing in front of you."
So the explorer picks up the stone and proceeds to bash the living heck out of the chief.
As he stands above the lifeless body, breathing heavily and surrounded by 100 natives with a look of shock on their faces, Gods voice booms out again: "Okay... NOW you're screwed."

Out in the middle of darkest Africa there was a White Missionary
living with a tribe of black natives.
On day the big chief comes along and calls the Missionary into
his hut, where he was sharpening his big axe. He explains to the white
man that his daughter has just given birth to a white baby, and
that since he's the only white man for thousands of miles, he will
be the main course that night.
"Now just hang on a minute, give me a chance to explain chief,"
says the Missionary. "You're jumping to conclusions here. Let me
tell you a story. See all those white sheep out in the field and
how there's one black one amongst them."
"OK!" says the Chief," You say nothing, I say nothing!"