Cloud Jokes / Recent Jokes

A monsoon is a French gentleman.For asphyxiation, apply artificial respiration until the patient is dead.To keep milk from turning sour, keep it in the cow.Water vapor gets together in a big cloud. When it gets big enough to be called a drop, it does.Vacuums are nothings. We only mention them to let them know we know they are there.A vibration is a motion that cannot make up its mind which way it wants to go.The law of gravity says no fair jumping up without coming down. Rain is saved up in cloud banks.Someday we might discover magnets that can point in any direction.One of the main causes of dust is janitors.Blood circulates through the body by flowing down one leg and up the other.Genetics explains why you look like your father, and if you don't, why you should.There is a tremendous weight pushing down on the center of the earth because so many people are stomping around there these days.The word "trousers" is an uncommon noun because it is singular at the top and plural more...

George was out for his daily walk and came upon a long ladder that stretched into the clouds. He walked this same route every day and this ladder was never there before. Curious, he began to climb it. Eventually, he climbed into the layer of clouds and saw a rather large, homely woman lying on a cloud.
"Take me now or climb the ladder to success!" she said.
Thinking that success had to be better than this, George continued climbing. Soon, he came upon another level of clouds and found a thinner, slightly cuter woman than before.
"Take me now or climb the ladder to success!" the woman said.
Noticing that his luck was changing, he continued to climb. On the next level of clouds, he found a rather attractive woman with not too bad a figure.
"Take me now or climb the ladder to success!" she said.
Knowing for sure that his luck was improving, he quickly continued climbing. Sure enough, on the next level, he found a gorgeous, slim, more...

THE FOLLOWING ARE ACTUAL ANSWERS GIVEN BY 5TH AND 6TH GRADERS:

The law of gravity says no fair jumping up without coming back down.
You can listen to thunder and tell how close you came to getting hit. If
you don't hear it, you got hit, so never mind.
Someday, we may discover how to make magnets that can point in any
direction.
A vibration is a motion that cannot make up its mind which way it wants
to go.
There are 26 vitamins in all, but some of the letters are yet to be
discovered.
There is a tremendous weight pushing down on the center of the Earth
because so many people are stomping around up there these days.
Genetics explains why you look like your father, and if you don't, why
you should.
Vacuums are nothings. We only mention them to let them know we know
they're there.
The cause of perfume disappearing is evaporation. Evaporation gets
blamed for a lot of things people forget to put the more...

*Question: What is one horsepower?*Answer: One horsepower is the amount of energy it takes to drag a horse 500 feet in one second.*You can listen to thunder after lightening and tell how close you came to getting hit. If you don't hear it you got hit, so never mind.*Talc is found on rocks and on babies.*The law of gravity says no fair jumping up without coming back down.*When they broke open molecules, they found they were only stuffed with atoms. But when theybroke open atoms, they found them stuffed with explosions.*When people run around and around in circles we say they are crazy. When planets do it we saythey are orbiting.*Rainbows are just to look at, not to really understand.*While the earth seems to be knowingly keeping its distance from the sun, it is really onlycentrificating.*Someday we may discover how to make magnets that can point in any direction.*South America has cold summers and hot winters, but somehow they still manage.*Most books now say our sun is a star. But it more...

There was a black guy a mexican guy and a white guy
They all died and went to heaven When they got up there an angel said sorry guys its not time for you guys to die yet so Im going to have to send you all back But since you guys have been in Heaven you guys when you go back to earth you guys cant step on a black cloud or something bad will happen to you
So they all said ok The first week back on earth the mexican steps on a black cloud and something bad happens to him he gets the ugliest girl on earth I mean the ugliest The second week the black guy steps on a black cloud something bad happens to him he gets the second ugliest girl in the world The white guy for a year or so doesnt step on a black cloud so the angel rewards him with the most prettiest girl in the world
So the white guy his girl the most prettiest in the world her freind asks her so how did you get with the white guy she says I stepped in a black cloud

Some oxygen molecules help fires burn while others help make water, so sometimes it's brother against brother.
In looking at a drop of water under a microscope, we find there are twice as many H's as O's.
Clouds are high-flying fogs.
Clouds just keep circling the earth around and around. And around. There is not much else to do.
Water vapor gets together in a cloud. When it is big enough to be called a drop, it does.
Humidity is the experience of looking for air and finding water.
We keep track of the humidity in the air so we won't drown when we breathe.
Rain is often known as soft water, oppositely known as hail.
Rain is saved up in cloud banks.
You can listen to thunder after lightening and tell how close you came to getting hit. If you don't hear it you got hit, so never mind.
Water freezes at 32 degrees and boils at 212 degrees. There are 180 degrees between freezing and boiling because there are 180 degrees between north and more...

Scientists have said a cosmic cloud poised to give birth to a massive star. The star is already booked on Maury to find out who the father is.