Colony Jokes

A man moves into a nudist colony. He receives a letter from his grandmother asking him to send her a current photo of himself in his new location.
Too embarrassed to let her know that he lives in a nudist colony, he cuts a photo in half but accidentally sends her the bottom half.
He's really worried when he realizes that he sent the wrong half, but then remembers how bad his grandmother's eyesight is and hopes she won't notice.
A few weeks later, he receives a letter from this grandmother. It says, "Thank you for the picture. Change your hair style... it makes your nose look too short."

Being in a nudist colony probably takes all the fun out of Halloween.

Q. What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
A. Slow down and use a lubricant.
Q. What's six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild?
A. Money.
Q. What's the difference between your wife and your job?
A. After five years your job will still suck.
Q. How can you spot the blind guy at the nudist colony?
A. It's not hard.
Q. Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony?
A. The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen
donuts.
Q: Who is the most popular girl at the nudist colony?
A. She is the one who can eat the last donut!
Q: What's the difference between a blimp and 365 blow jobs?
A: One is a Goodyear, and the other is a great year!
Q: Why do the men in Scotland wear kilts?
A: Because the sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.

Q: What's so good about an Ethiopian blowjob? A: You know she'll swallow. Q: Why don't they teach driver's education and sex education on the same day in Iraq? A: They don't want to wear out the camel. Q: What's the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish wife? A: A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry. Q: What do you get if you cross a Hell's Angel with a Jehovah's Witness? A: Some one who knocks on your door on a Sunday morning and tells YOU to fuck off! Q: Do you know why women fake orgasm? A: Because men fake foreplay. Q: What's the difference between getting a divorce and getting circumcised? A: When you get a divorce, you get rid of the whole prick! Q: A woman of 35 thinks of having children. What does a man of 35 think of? A: Dating children. Q: What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golfball? A: A guy will actually search for a golfball. Q: Why does a bride smile when she walks up the aisle? A: She knows she's given her last blow job. Q: Who is the more...

Q. What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? A. Slow down and use a lubricant.Q. What's six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? A. Money.Q. What's the difference between your wife and your job? A. After five years your job will still suck.Q. How can you spot the blind guy at the nudist colony? A. It's not hard.Q. Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony? A. The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts.Q: Who is the most popular girl at the nudist colony? A. She is the one who can eat the last donut! Q: What's the difference between a blimp and 365 blow jobs? A: One is a Goodyear, and the other is a great year! Q: Why do the men in Scotland wear kilts? A: Because the sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.