Crease Jokes

In a Test between India and the West Indies, the fiery Wes Hall was sending quivers down the Indian spine. The new batsman walked slowly to the crease, not feeling unlike a lamb at the slaughter house.

As the great bowler thundered in, suddenly he stood up in the crease, and signalled that he wanted the sight screen adjusted.

Adjustments were made and the bowler was ready to come in again.

Once again, in the middle of his run-up, the batsman found something disturbing in the sight screen. Indeed, this went on a few times before the irritated umpire walked up to the batsman and enquired,

"Where do you want the sight screen, for God's sake?"

The batsman asked, with an ounce of fear, " Couldn't I have between him and me?"

In a Test between India and Australia, the fiery Bret Lee was sending quivers down the Indian spine. The new batsman, our Santa, walked slowly to the crease, not feeling unlike a lamb at the slaughter house.
As Lee thundered in, suddenly Santa stood up in the crease, and signalled that he wanted the sight screen adjusted. Adjustments were made and Brett Lee was ready to come in again.
Once again, in the middle of his run-up, Santa found something disturbing in the sight screen. Indeed, this went on a few times before the irritated umpire, Steve Bucknor walked up to the batsman and enquired, "Where do you want the sight screen, for God's sake?"
Santa asked, with an ounce of fear, "Could I have it between Lee and me?"

In a local game. the visiting side had two fearsome fast bowlers. Everybody was terrified of them, none more so that the opening bat for the home team. He crept, shaking, to the crease and awaited the first ball. The bowler thundered up to the crease and hurled down a scorcher. The batsman waved his bat at it and it was fielded at mid-on. Immediately, he walked for the pavilion.

'Where are you going?' cried the bowler.' He caught it on first bounce.'

'Looked good enough to me' replied the retreating batsman.