Cucumbers Jokes

101 Reasons why women prefer cucumbers to Men
1. The average cucumber is at least 6 inches long.
2. Cucumbers stay hard for a week.
3. Cucumbers won't tell you size doesn't count.
4. Cucumbers don't get too excited.
5. Cucumbers never suffer from performance anxiety.
6. Cucumbers are easy to pick up.
7. You can fondle a cucumber in a supermarket... and you know how firm it is before you take it home.
8. Cucumbers can get away any weekend.
9. With a cucumber you can get a single room... and you won't have to check-in as Mrs. Cucumber.
10. A cucumber will always respect you in the morning.
11. You can go to a movie with a cucumber... and see the movie.
12. You can go to a drive-in with a cucumber... and you can stay in the front seat.
13. With a cucumber you can always wait until you get home.
14. A cucumber won't eat all the popcorn... or send you out for Milk Duds.
15. A cucumber won't drag you to a John Wayne Film more...

1. The average cucumber is at least six inches long.
2. Cucumbers stay hard for a week.
3. A cucumber won't tell you size don't count.
4. Cucumbers don't get TOO excited.
5. A cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety.
6. Cucumbers are easy to pick up.
7. You can fondle cucumbers in a supermarket... and you know how firm it is before you take it home.
8. Cucumbers can get away any weekend.
9. With a cucumber you can get a single room and. .. you won't have to check in as' Mrs. Cucumber'.
10. A cucumber will always respect you in the morning.
11. If you can go to the movie with a cucumber and see the movie at a drive in you can stay in the front seat.
12. A cucumber can always wait until you get home.
13. A cucumber won't eat all the popcorn.
14. A cucumber won't drag you out to a John Wayne Film Festival.
15. A cucumber won't ask:' Am I first?'
16. Cucumbers don't care whether you're a virgin.
17. more...

You can enjoy a cucumber all night long.
You don't have to drink wine and dine with a cucumber before getting to the fun stuff.
Your cucumber will always wait patiently for you in the car while you go shopping.
When your cucumber goes soft you toss it.
Cucumbers can't tell time, so they don't know when you're late.
A cucumber doesn't get jealous when you grab another cucumber (or even a carrot!)
When you go to the grocery store, you can always pick up a cucumber.
A cucumber won't get upset if you come home with another cucumber on your breath (or a fresh leafy vegetable in your pocket).
If you eat a cucumber right, you always have a mouthful.
You can have more than one cucumber a night and not feel guilty (they're low in calories)
A cucumber always goes down easy.
You can share a cucumber with friends.
You always know when you're the first one to eat a cucumber.
A cucumber is always hard.
You can have a cucumber in public
A more...

Three nuns went to a cucumber stand in an open market one day. They asked how much the cucumbers were. The merchant said thatthey were 4 for a dollar. The nuns said okay. The puzzled merchant asked why they needed four cucumbers whenthere were only three of them. A nun answered back, "Well, we could alway eat one."

Three nuns went to a cucumber stand in an open market one day.They asked how much the cucumbers were. The merchant said thatthey were 4 for a dollar. The nuns said okay.The puzzled merchant asked why they needed four cucumbers whenthere were only three of them.A nun answered back, "Well, we could alway eat one."