Custom Jokes / Recent Jokes

Now look at them yo-yos, that's the way you do it
You write the code that runs the WebTV
That ain't working, that's the way you do it
Get yer home page for nothin' and your hits for free.
Now that ain't workin', that's the way you do it
Lemme tell ya, them guys can code
Maybe get some backing' fore they even have a product
Maybe in a month they'll IPO.
We got to install Netscape Web Servers
Custom config delivery
We got to install all of these browsers
They got to all speak HTTP.
See that little doofus with the glasses and the cowlick?
Yeah buddy, that's his own code
That little doofus got a billion options
That little doofus he just IPO'd
We got to install Netscape Web Servers
Custom config delivery
We got to install all of this fiber
We gonna need a big ol' T3
I shoulda learned to code in Java
I shoulda learned some CGI
Look at that web page, they got it dancing right across more...

An american went to a custom office. The custom officer asked to prove that he was an american. so, the american showed his american passport. The custom officer asked him to makea sentence with green, yellow, and pink. The american said once i went to my brothers law house the phone rang green green................ I pink up the phone and somebody said yellowwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

My old boss had spent some time writing software packages for this particular program. The software usually came as source code and was executed through an
interpreter. He started a small business selling his custom software.One day at a scientific meeting, he noticed another company was showing the software
with' remarkably' similar functionality as his own. He wandered over to watch the demo and the longer he watched, the more familiar it looked. Eventually, when the sales gerbil had gathered a good crowd, he asked in a rather loud voice, “Are you using my copyrighted copy for this?”“Of course not!” the sales gerbil replied.“So, what happens if you press [key combination]?”“Nothing.”“Well, humor me. Do it for me.”“Ok, sir, but I can assure it you does. . . ” and upon pressing the keys. . .
the large screen popped up my boss' copyright notice.It was widely accepted as the biggest laugh of the show.

To Whom It May Concern:
After nine weeks and many phone calls, I am writing this letter to discuss a few items that the underwriter has not yet brought up (but probably will).
I am not now, nor have I ever been a member of the Communist Party. Neither my parents nor my grandparents were ever members of the Communist Party. I was born seven months after my parents were married. I hope this doesn't disqualify me for the mortgage, I will have my mother and father send a letter to you explaining how this happened if you feel it is necessary.
I am not a bed wetter or a homosexual.
I have no religious affiliation. If this is a problem, I will get a letter from a priest, minister, and rabbi stating they will let me join up if you feel it is necessary.
I want to apologize for having $36,000 in the bank account that I reported having $8,000. I guess if the underwriters find out that I have over $100,000 spread out in other banks and investments, I never will get the more...