Density Jokes / Recent Jokes

This is a revolutionary breakthrough in technology: no wires, no electric circuits, no batteries, nothing to be connected or switched on. It's so easy to use, even a child can operate it.
Compact and portable, it can be used anywhere -- even sitting in an armchair by the fire -- yet it is powerful enough to hold as much information as a CD-ROM disc.
Here's how it works:
This device is constructed of sequentially numbered sheets of paper (recyclable), each capable of holding thousands of bits of information. The pages are locked together with a custom-fit device called a binder which keeps the sheets in their correct sequence.
Opaque Paper Technology (OPT) allows manufacturers to use both sides of the sheet, doubling the information density and cutting costs. Experts are divided on the prospects for further increases in information density; for now, the devices with more information simply use more pages. Each sheet is scanned optically, registering information more...

Introducing the new Bio-Optic Organized Knowledge device, trade-named - BOOK.
BOOK is a revolutionary breakthrough in technology: no wires, no electric circuits, no batteries, nothing to be connected or switched on. It's so easy to use, even a child can operate it.
Compact and portable, it can be used anywhere - even sitting in an armchair by the fire - yet it is powerful enough to hold as much information as a CD-ROM disc.
Here's how it works:
BOOK is constructed of sequentially numbered sheets of paper (recyclable), each capable of holding thousands of bits of information. The pages are locked together with a custom-fit device called a binder which keeps the sheets in their correct sequence.
Opaque Paper Technology (OPT) allows manufacturers to use both sides of the sheet, doubling the information density and cutting costs. Experts are divided on the prospects for further increases in information density; for now, BOOKS with more information simply use more more...

ANNOUNCING THE LATEST IN TECHNOLOGY:
BUILT-IN ORDERLY ORGANIZED KNOWLEDGE (BOOK)

The BOOK is a revolutionary breakthrough in technology: no wires, no electric circuits, no batteries, nothing to be connected to or switched on. It's so easy to use even a child can operate it. Just lift its cover! Compact and portable, it can be used anywhere (even sitting in an armchair by the fire) yet it is powerful enough to hold as much information as a CD-ROM disc. Here's how it works...

Each BOOK is constructed of sequentially numbered sheets of paper capable of holding thousands of bits of information. These pages are locked together with a custom-fit process called binding, which keeps the sheets in their correct sequence. Opaque Paper Technology (OPT) allows manufacturers to use both sides of the sheet, doubling the information density and cutting costs in half.

Experts are divided concerning the prospects for further increases in information density; for more...

- If you have cleared the entire house (or apartment), encountered no resistance and have not cussed out once, you hit the wrong house.
- The newly elected Sheriff is not the one you voted for, and he knows it!
- Court will be scheduled in the middle of your days off.
- Hot calls will only come over the air 10 minutes before the end of your shift.
- You will never get the urge to use the bathroom until you have left the station.
- Surprise inspections will only occur after you have been in a foot pursuit through mud.
- The Mayor will get a traffic ticket the day before your department negotiates for a salary increase.
- The bigger they are, the harder they fall. Also the harder they punch, kick and choke.
- Never search a dark warehouse with a cop whose nickname is "Boom-Boom".
- If you park your patrol car in the exact center of the Gobi desert, within 5 minutes someone will pull up and ask for direction.
- To err is human, more...

It's certainly a sad sign of the times when international terrorism spoils the Christmas pudding. Security scanners this Christmas season at a major British airport have been fooled by hundreds of Christmas puddings, which they cannot tell from Semtex plastic explosive.
Travelers heading off for the holidays from Manchester airport in northern England had packed the traditional fare in their luggage. But, according to Reuters news reports, the $23 million baggage security system was unable to differentiate between the explosive of choice of the international terrorist and a plum pudding, forcing security officials to examine hundreds of bags.
Airport chiefs insisted that the sophisticated security system was not malfunctioning. "It is designed to detect organic matter, and Christmas puddings have unusual density, which alerts the system," an airport spokesman said.
The story would be amusing were it not such a sad commentary on the state of peace on Earth and more...