Desert Jokes / Recent Jokes

An Antartian was walking through the Sahara desert, desperate for water, when he saw something, far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he walked towards the image, only to find a little old man sitting at a card table with a bunch of neckties laid out on it.
The Antartian asked, "Please, I'm dying of thirst, can I have some water?"
The man replied, "I don't have any water, but why don't you buy a tie?
Here's one that goes nicely with your robe."
The Antartian shouted, "I don't want a tie, you idiot, I need water!"
"OK, don't buy a tie. But to show you what a nice guy I am, I'll tell you that over that hill there, about 4 miles, is a nice restaurant. Walk that way, they'll give you all the water you want."
The Antartian thanked him and walked away towards the hill and eventually disappeared. Three hours later the Antartian came crawling back to where the man was sitting behi

An American tourist wanted to see some of the Sahara desert, so he rented a camel. Having packed plenty of water and food for a 3 day sojourn, he set out. He was on the 2nd day and entered an oasis to rest and water his camel and noted that a guy had a shop at the oasis with a neon sign, "CAMEL MECHANIC." He looked in the shop and saw several camels being worked on. His camel seemed to be working fine so the next morning, he began his return trip.
Several hours into the desert, the camel stopped walking, and just stood there like a statue. He tried pulling, yanking, pushing, every method imaginable to get the camel to move, but it wouldn't budge.
He then decided to backtrack by foot and find the oasis with the camel mechanic. Following the tracks made in the sand, he spent the better part of the day walking through the sand dunes back to the oasis. Finally getting there, he went to the camel mechanic and explained that his camel just stopped and was sitting out there more...

There's the story about the man that walks into a house of ill
repute in Reno and says, "I'll give $20,000 to any woman here who'll
come into the desert with me and do it MY way."
One of the ladies agrees, and off they go driving into the desert.
After about an hour she gets curious, and asks him "Just what is
your way?"
"On credit."

Ed and Fred were flying along when the two idiots crash-landed on a desert island." What should we do?", said Ed." Hmmm, let's think.", replied Fred. Ed shook his head, "No, let's do something you can do too!"

There's the story about the man that walks into a house of ill repute in Reno and says, "I'll give $20,000 to any woman here who'll come into the desert with me and do it MY way."
One of the ladies agrees, and off they go driving into the desert. After about an hour she gets curious, and asks him "Just what is your way?"
"On credit."

A man is crawling through the Sahara desert when he is approached by another man riding on a camel. As the rider approaches, the crawling man whispers through his parched lips, "Water. .. please. .. can you give. .. water. .."
"I'm sorry," replies the man on the camel, "I don't have any water with me. But I'd be delighted to sell you a necktie."
"Necktie?" whispers the man. "I need water!"
"They're only four dollars apiece."
"I need water."
"Okay, okay, two for seven dollars."
"Please! I need water!" the man exclaims.
"I don't have any water, all I have are ties," replies the salesman, as he heads off into the distance.
By now the man has lost all track of time, crawling through the desert seemingly for days. Finally, nearly dead, with clothes tattered and skin peeling under the relentless sun, he comes upon a restaurant. Summoning his last bit of more...

A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde went on a trip to the desert. They each brought one item for survival.
The red-head brought water. The blonde asked, “Why? ” The red-head replied, “To prevent us from dying of thirst. ”
The brunette brought food. The blonde asked, “Why? ” The brunette replied, “To prevent us from dying of hunger. ”
The blonde brought a car door. The red-head and brunette asked, “Why? ” The blonde replied, “To roll down the window if it gets hot. ”