Diane Jokes

Jack’s grandfather left him ten million dollars, and the next week Diane agreed
to marry him. After three months of married life, Jack noticed that his beautiful new
wife was ignoring him more and more. On the rare occasion that she would go to bed with him she would be indifferent, or even worse, called out other men’s names!
Whenever they went out in public, she ignored him and flirted with other
men. Finally, he decided to confront her.
Diane, ” he said, “the only reason you married me was because my grandfather
left me ten million dollars when he died"
"Don’t be ridiculous, ” she replied, “I don’t care who gave you the money!"

A neighbor dropped in to see her friend and found her sitting at the kitchen table, staring blankly at a half-empty cup of coffee, her four kids arguing loudly in the next room.
"What's the matter, Diane?" she asked
"Morning sickness," Diane groaned.
"I didn't even know you were pregnant," said the surprised neighbor.
"I'm not!" replied a very harried Diane. "I'm just sick of mornings!"

On the subject of Cheers, my favorite setup occurred as follows:
Diane comes in to Cheers and the gang virtually ignores her. Then Norm walks in.
Gang: NORM!!!
Norm: Hello everybody.
Diane: How come you guys can't do that when I walk in?
Sam: You know, you're right Diane. Walk out and come back in.
Diane walks out and then comes back in.
Gang: NORM!!!

Diane began her job as an elementary school counselor and was very eager to help.
One day during recess she noticed a boy standing all alone on one side of a playing field, while the rest of the kids were enjoying a game of soccer at the other. She approached the boy and asked if he was alright. He told her that he was.
A short time later, Diane noticed that the boy was in the same spot, still by himself.
She approached him again and asked, "Would you like me to be your friend?" The boy hesitated for a moment, then said, "Sure," while looking at her suspiciously. Feeling she was making progress, Diane asked, "Why are you standing here all by yourself?"
"Because," the boy said with great exasperation, "I'm the goalie."

Jack's grandfather left him ten million dollars, and the next week Diane agreed to marry him.
After three months of married life, Jack noticed that his beautiful new wife was ignoring him more and more. On the rare occasion that she would go to bed with him she would be indifferent, or even worse, called out other men's names!
Whenever they went out in public, she ignored him and flirted with other men. Finally, he decided to confront her.
"Diane," he said, "The only reason you married me was because my grandfather left me ten million dollars when he died"
"Don't be ridiculous," she replied, "I don't care who gave you the money!"