Dilberted Jokes / Recent Jokes

BLAMESTORMING: Sitting in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.
SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, criticizes on everything, and then leaves.
CHAINSAW CONSULTANT: An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount, leaving the top brass with clean hands.
CUBE FARM: An office filled with cubicles.
IDEA HAMSTERS: People who always have their idea generators running.
MOUSE POTATO: The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.
PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
SITCOMs: (Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage) What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids.
SQUIRT THE BIRD: To transmit a signal to a satellite.
STARTER MARRIAGE: A short-lived first marriage that ends in divorce more...

Here are the latest terms to add to your vocabulary in the late '90's office environment.
Assmosis - The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss.
Blamestorming - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.
Seagull Manager - A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps all over everything and then leaves.
Salmon Day - The experience of spending an entire day swimming up stream only to get screwed and die in the end.
Chainsaw Consultant - An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee head count, leaving the brass with clean hands.
CLM - Career Limiting Move - Used by microserfs to describe an ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM.
Adminisphere - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often more...

Blame storming - sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.
Beepilepsy - The brief seizure people sometimes suffer when their beepers go off, especially in vibrator mode. Characterized by physical spasms, goofy facial expressions, and stopping speech in mid sentence.
Cube farm - an office filled with cubicles.
Ego surfing - scanning the Net, databases, print media etc. looking for references to one's own name.
Prairie dogging - something loud happens in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
Idea hamsters - people who always seem to have their idea generators running.
Mouse potato - the on-line generation's answer to the couch potato.
Ohnosecond - that minuscule fraction of time in which you realize you've just made a big mistake.
SITCOM - stands for Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage.
Stress puppy - a person who thrives on being more...

BLAMESTORMING - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.
PRAIRIE DOGGING - When someone yells or drops something loudly in a "cube farm" (an office full of cubicles) and everyone's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
TOURISTS - People who take training classes just to get a vacation from their jobs. "We had three serious students in the class; the rest were just tourists."
TREEWARE - Printed computer software/hardware documentation.
CLM (Career Limiting Move) - Used among microserfs to describe ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM. (Also known as CEB - Career Ending Behavior)
OHNOSECOND - That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake. (See CLM)
ADMINISPHERE - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the more...

BLAMESTORMING - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.PRAIRIE DOGGING - When someone yells or drops something loudly in a "cube farm" (an office full of cubicles) and everyone's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.TOURISTS - People who take training classes just to get a vacation from their jobs. "We had three serious students in the class; the rest were just tourists."TREEWARE - Printed computer software/hardware documentation.CLM (Career Limiting Move) - Used among microserfs to describe ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM. (Also known as CEB - Career Ending Behavior)OHNOSECOND - That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake. (See CLM)ADMINISPHERE - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the admini-sphere are often more...