Generica Jokes

BLAMESTORMING: Sitting in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.
SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, criticizes on everything, and then leaves.
CHAINSAW CONSULTANT: An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount, leaving the top brass with clean hands.
CUBE FARM: An office filled with cubicles.
IDEA HAMSTERS: People who always have their idea generators running.
MOUSE POTATO: The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.
PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
SITCOMs: (Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage) What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids.
SQUIRT THE BIRD: To transmit a signal to a satellite.
STARTER MARRIAGE: A short-lived first marriage that ends in divorce more...

New Words for the 2000s
Blamestorming - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.
Chainsaw Consultant - An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount, leaving the top brass with clean hands.
Percussive Maintenance - The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.
Uninstalled - Euphemism for being fired. Heard on the voicemail of a vice president at a downsizing computer firm: "You have reached the number of an uninstalled vice president. Please dial our main number and ask the operator for assistance." See also Decruitment.
SITCOMs - What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids. Stands for Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage.
Starter Marriage - A short-lived first marriage that ends in a divorce with no kids, no property and no regrets.
Tourists - People more...

New Words for the 2000sBlamestorming - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.Chainsaw Consultant - An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount, leaving the top brass with clean hands.Percussive Maintenance - The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.Uninstalled - Euphemism for being fired. Heard on the voicemail of a vice president at a downsizing computer firm: "You have reached the number of an uninstalled vice president. Please dial our main number and ask the operator for assistance." See also Decruitment.SITCOMs - What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids. Stands for Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage.Starter Marriage - A short-lived first marriage that ends in a divorce with no kids, no property and no regrets.Tourists - People who take training classes just to get more...

Here are the latest terms to add to your vocabulary in the office environment.

Assmosis- The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss.

Blamestorming- Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.

Seagull Manager- A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps all over everything and then leaves.

Salmon Day- The experience of spending an entire day swimming up stream only to get screwed and die in the end.

Chainsaw Consultant- An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee head count, leaving the brass with clean hands.

CLM - Career Limiting Move - Used by microserfs to describe an ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM.

Adminisphere - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from more...

Here are the latest terms to add to your vocabulary in the late '90's office environment.
Assmosis - The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss.
Blamestorming - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.
Seagull Manager - A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps all over everything and then leaves.
Salmon Day - The experience of spending an entire day swimming up stream only to get screwed and die in the end.
Chainsaw Consultant - An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee head count, leaving the brass with clean hands.
CLM - Career Limiting Move - Used by microserfs to describe an ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM.
Adminisphere - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often more...