Dilberted Jokes / Recent Jokes

Some more terms for the TECHNO OFFICE DICTIONARY

Perot To quit unexpectedly, as in' My cellular phone just perot'ed.'

CLM (Career-Limiting Move) Used among microserfs to describe an ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM.

Treeware Hacker slang for documentation or other printed material.

Dead Tree Edition The paper version of a publication available in both paper and electronic forms, as in:' The dead tree edition of the San Francisco Chronicle...'

Dilberted To be exploited and oppressed by your boss. Derived from the experiences of Dilbert, the geek-in-hell comic strip character.' I've been dilberted again. The old man revised the specs for the fourth time this week.'

World Wide Wait The real meaning of WWW.

CGI Joe A hard-core CGI script programmer with all the social skills and charisma of a plastic action figure.

Dorito Syndrome Feelings of more...

Here are the latest terms to add to your vocabulary in the office environment.

Assmosis- The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss.

Blamestorming- Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.

Seagull Manager- A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps all over everything and then leaves.

Salmon Day- The experience of spending an entire day swimming up stream only to get screwed and die in the end.

Chainsaw Consultant- An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee head count, leaving the brass with clean hands.

CLM - Career Limiting Move - Used by microserfs to describe an ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM.

Adminisphere - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from more...

404
someone who is clueless, from the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found", meaning the requested document couldn't be located - Don't bother asking him, he's 404.
Adminisphere
The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rack and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.
Alpha Geek
The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group. "Ask Larry, he's the alpha geek around here."
Beepilepsy
The brief seizure people sometimes suffer when their beepers go off, especially in vibrator mode. Characterized by physical spasms, goofy facial expressions, and stopping speech in mid-sentence.
Blamestorming
sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.
Brain Fart
A byproduct of a bloated mind producing information more...