"Generation X and their office lingo" joke
404
someone who is clueless, from the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found", meaning the requested document couldn't be located - Don't bother asking him, he's 404.
Adminisphere
The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rack and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.
Alpha Geek
The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group. "Ask Larry, he's the alpha geek around here."
Beepilepsy
The brief seizure people sometimes suffer when their beepers go off, especially in vibrator mode. Characterized by physical spasms, goofy facial expressions, and stopping speech in mid-sentence.
Blamestorming
sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.
Brain Fart
A byproduct of a bloated mind producing information effortlessly. A burst of useful information. "I know you're busy on the Microsoft story, but can you give us a brain fart on the Mitnik bust?" Variation of old hacker slang that had more negative connotations.
CGI Joe
A hard-core CGI script programmer with all the social skills and charisma of a plastic action figure.
Chainsaw consultant
an outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount, leaving the top brass with clean hands
CLM (Career-Limiting Move)
Used among microserfs to describe an ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM.
Cobweb Site
A World Wide Web Site that hasn't been updated for a long time. A dead web page.
Cube farm
an office filled with cubicles.
Dead Tree Edition
The paper version of a publication available in both paper and electronic forms, as in: "The dead tree edition of the San Francisco Chronicle..."
Dilberted
To be exploited and oppressed by your boss. Derived from the experiences of Dilbert, the geek-in-hell comic strip character. "I've been dilberted again. The old man revised the specs for the fourth time this week."
Dorito Syndrome
Feelings of emptiness and dissatisfaction triggered by addictive substances that lack nutritional content. "I just spent six hours surfing the Web, and now I've got a bad case of Dorito Syndrome."
Ego surfing
scanning the Net, databases, print media, and so on, looking for references to one's own name.
Elvis year
the peak year of something's popularity - Barney the dinosaur's Elvis year was 1993.
Glazing
Corporate-speak for sleeping with your eyes open. A popular pastime at conferences and early-morning meetings. "Didn't he notice that half the room was glazing by the second session?"
Gray Matter
Older, experienced business people hired by young entrepreneurial firms looking to appear more reputable and established.
Graybar Land
The place you go while you're staring at a computer that's processing something very slowly (while you watch the gray bar creep across the screen). "I was in graybar land for what seemed like hours, thanks to that CAD rendering."
Idea hamsters
people who always seem to have their idea generators running .
It's a Feature
From the adage "It's not a bug, it's a feature." Used sarcastically to describe an unpleasant experience that you wish to gloss over.
Keyboard Plaque
The disgusting buildup of dirt and crud found on computer keyboards. "Are there any other terminals I can use? This one has a bad case of keyboard plaque."
Mouse potato
the on-line generation's answer to the couch potato.
Ohnosecond
that minuscule fraction of time in which you realize you've just made a big mistake.
Open-Collar Workers
People who work at home or telecommute.
Prairie dogging
something loud happens in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
Salmon Day
The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed in the end.
SITCOM
stands for Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage.
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