Doc Jokes / Recent Jokes
A man comes to his doctor and tells him that his wife doesn't
want to have sex with him for the last 7 months. The doc tells
the man to bring his wife in so he can talk to her. So the wife
comes into the doctors office and the doctor asks her whats
wrong and why doesn't she want to have sex with her husband
anymore.
The wife tells him, "For the last 7 months every morning I take
a cab to work. I dont have any money so the cab driver asks
me,' So are you going to pay today or what?' so I take a' or
what'. When I get to work I'm late so the boss asks me,' So are
we going to write this down in the book or what?' so I take a' or
what'. Back home agian I take the cab and again I don't have
any money so the cab driver asks me again,' So are you going
to pay this time or what?' so again I take a' or what'. So you
see doc when I get home I'm all tired out, and I don't want it
any more."
The doctor thinks more...
10. Musical Recliners
9. Spin the Bottle of Mylanta
8. Hide and Go Pee
7. Simon Says Something Incoherent
6. Doc, Doc Goose
5. Red Rover, Red Rover, the Nurse Says Bend Over
4. Kick the Bucket
3. 20 Questions Shouted into your Good Ear
2. Pin the Toupee on the Bald Guy
1. Sag, You're It!
After a couple of years a couple wanted to have children, but nothing worked. So they went to a doctor, and got checked over. The doctor took time to reassure them. "Don't worry," he said, "Just takethis sample bottle home and do the necessary, and bring it back tomorrow." So he went home feeling better, and went back the next day with his littlebottle. It was empty. The doctor looked at the bottle carefully, " Problems?" he said. "Have I ever had problems, doc.!" the man replied. " I went home andstraight upstairs, and worked at it for over half an hour. Both hands. Itell you doc, my hands got too sore to hold it! I had to get the wifeupstairs and she had a go. But even she, with all her experience, couldn'tdo it. " "So what did you do?" said the doctor. " We had a discussion, and got the mother-in-law involved. I was sureshe'd manage it, but it was no go, even when she used her mouth. And doc, she tried with her teeth more...
A old snake goes to see his Doctor. "Doc, I need something for my eyes...can't see well these days". The Doc fixes him up with a pair of glasses and tells him to return in 2 weeks. The snake comes back in 2 weeks and tells the doctor he's very depressed. Doc says, "What's the problem...didn't the glasses help you?" "The glasses are fine doc, I just discovered I've been living with a water hose the past 2 years!"
Santa suffering from cold was shivering. His son called a doc.
Doc: wht happened?
Son: Bimari da ta pata nahun par baapu saver da VIBRATION mode te lagaya hai
A recent college graduate took a new job in a hilly Eastern city and began commuting each day to work through a tiring array of tunnels, bridges and traffic jams. To make the task less onerous, he invited several of his coworkers to share the ride. He soon found, however, that the commute continued to get more stressful, especially the trips through the tunnels.
He consulted the company doctor. "Doc," the frustrated commuter complained, "I'm fine on the bridges, in the traffic, in the day and at night, and even when Joe forgets to bathe all week long. But when I get in the tunnels and I've got those four other guys crowded around me in the car, I get anxious and dizzy and feel like I'm going to explode."
? Without further analysis, the doctor announced he had identified the ailment. "What is it, Doc? Am I going insane?"
"No, no, no, my boy. You have something very common in these parts."
"Tell me! more...
A man visits his doctor. "I think I have a problem, doc," said the patient. "One of my balls has turned blue." The doctor examined the man briefly and concluded the patient would die if they didn't have his testicle removed. "Are you crazy?!" exclaimed the patient, "How could I let you do such a thing to me?" "Do you want to die?", asked the doctor rhetorically, and the patient had to agree to have his testicle removed. But two weeks after the operation, he came back. "Doc, I don't know how to say this, but the other ball has turned blue too." Again, the doctor told him that if he wants to live, his other testicle must be cut off too. And again, the man was very reluctant. "Hey, do you want to die?", asked the doc, and the patient had to agree to the operation. But, about two weeks after he is testicleless, he returned to the doctor. "I think something is very wrong with me. My penis is now completely more...