Eden Jokes / Recent Jokes
…And God created Adam and Eve…
On yet another day in Eden, God decided to take a casual stroll away from his more-or-less successful creations…he didn't get very far before being interrupted once again by the individuals created ‘in his likeness'…theoretically anyway. The stampede of footsteps behind him signaled the arrival of the two ‘perfect' creations.
"Father! Eve's breaking one of the Commandments again!
Adam was strolling through the Garden of Eden, and he asked God, "God can you put someone else on this planet with me? It`s kind of lonely here?"
So God said, "I will put on earth a woman, "
"`What is this ‘woman’?" asked Adam.
"A woman is somebody who will provide companionship and take care of all your needs," explained God.
"Oh holy master, what is the price for this women"` asked Adam.
"The price for her is your left arm and your right eye," said God.
Then Adam replied, "Ehh... what can I get for a rib?"
A Brit, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden.
"Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit. "They must be British."
"Nonsense," the Frenchman disagrees. "They're naked, and so beautiful. Clearly, they are French."
"No clothes, no shelter," the Russian points out, "they have only an apple to eat, and they're being told this is paradise. Clearly, they are Russian."
The garden of Eden
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God.
"Lord, I have a problem!"
"What`s the problem, Eve?"
"Lord, I know you created me and provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, but I`m just not happy."
"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above.
"Lord, I am lonely, and I`m sick to death of apples."
"Well Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a Man for you."
"What`s a Man, Lord?"
"This man will be a flawed creature, with many bad traits. He`ll lie, cheat, and be very competitive; all in all, he`ll give you a hard time. But, he`ll be bigger, faster, and will like to hunt and kill things. He will look silly when he`s aroused, but since you`ve been complaining, I`ll create him in such a way that he will satisfy your physical needs. He will be witless and will revel in childish things like fighting and more...
…And God created Adam and Eve…
On yet another day in Eden, God decided to take a casual stroll away from his more-or-less successful creations…he didn't get very far before being interrupted once again by the individuals created ‘in his likeness'…theoretically anyway. The stampede of footsteps behind him signaled the arrival of the two ‘perfect' creations.
"Father! Eve's breaking one of the Commandments again!
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord, I have a problem!"
"What's the problem, Eve?"
"Lord, I know you've created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedy snake, but I'm just not happy."
"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above.
"Lord, I am lonely. And I'm sick to death of apples."
"Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you." "What's a 'man', Lord?"
"This man will be a flawed creature, with aggressive tendencies, an enormous ego and an inability to empathize or listen to you properly. All in all, he'll give you a hard time. But, he'll be bigger and faster and more muscular than you. He'll be really good at fighting and kicking a ball about and hunting fleet-footed ruminants, and not altogether bad in the sack."
"Sounds great," says Eve, with an more...
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord, I have a problem!""What's the problem, Eve?""Lord, I know you've created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedy snake, but I'm just not happy.""Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above."Lord, I am lonely. And I'm sick to death of apples.""Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you." "What's a 'man', Lord?""This man will be a flawed creature, with aggressive tendencies, an enormous ego and an inability to empathize or listen to you properly. All in all, he'll give you a hard time. But, he'll be bigger and faster and more muscular than you. He'll be really good at fighting and kicking a ball about and hunting fleet-footed ruminants, and not altogether bad in the sack.""Sounds great," says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow."Yeah, more...