Elephant Jokes / Recent Jokes
There was this tiger that woke up one morning and just felt great. He felt so good, he went out and cornered a small monkey and roared at him, "WHO IS THE MIGHTIEST OF ALL THE JUNGLE ANIMALS?"
And the poor quaking little monkey replied, "You are of course, no one is mightier than you."
A little while later the tiger confronted a deer, and bellowed out, "WHO IS THE GREATEST AND STRONGEST OF ALL THE JUNGLE ANIMALS?"
The deer shook so hard it could barely speak, but managed to stammer, "Oh great tiger, you are by far the mightiest animal in the jungle."
The tiger, being on a roll, swaggered up to an elephant who was quietly munching on some weeds, and roared at the top of his voice: "WHO IS THE MIGHTIEST OF ALL THE ANIMALS IN THE JUNGLE?"
Well, the elephant grabbed the tiger with his trunk, picked him up, slammed him down; picked him up again, and shook him until the tiger was just a more...
Three mischievous boys went to the zoo one day for an outing, since theyhad been at school all week. They decided to visit the elephant cage, but soon enough, they were picked up by a cop for causing a commotion.
The officer hauled them off to security for questioning. The supervisor in charge asked them to give their names and tell what they were doing at theelephant cage.
The first boy innocently said, "My name is Gary, and I was just throwing peanuts into the elephant cage."
The second added, "My name is Larry, and all I was doing was throwing peanuts into the elephant cage."
The third boy was a little shaken up and said, "Well, my name is Peter, but my friends call me Peanuts."
What do you get if you cross a spider and an elephant? I'm not sure, but if you see one walking across the ceiling then run before it collapses!
Q: How do you put an elephant in a fridge?
A: Open the door put the elephant in and close the door
Q: How do you put a giraffe in a fridge?
A: Open the door take the elephant out, put the giraffe in, close the door
Q: If there is an animal meeting and every single animal is going to be there except for one, which one would it be?
A: The giraffe, It's still stuck in the Fridge
Q: If you had to get across a swamp and it was full of crocodiles how would you do it?
A: Just swim across, The crocodiles are at the animal meeting.
One day an elephant and a mouse were sitting in a bar. The
elephant got very drunk and was exiting out of the bar with
the mouse and fell into a hole. Well the mouse said he
had a little red sports car which would pull the elephant
out of the hole. And he did just that. Well the next
night the elephant and the mouse were back at the same
bar, but this time the mouse exited the bar and fell into
the hole. So the elephant said he had a big dick that
the mouse could climb up on, so he put his dick in the
hole and the mouse climbed up it.
What's the moral of the story?
You don't need a little red sports car if you have a
BIG DICK! Ha Ha
Q:WHY DID THE ELEPHANT SAID
TO THE DUCK"GOOD THING YOU HAVE FLAT FEET THAT GO WITH MY FLAT FEET"
A:SO THE ELEPHANT CAN STEP ON THE DUCKS FLAT FEET.
An ingenious artist-friend of ours recently gave us a foolproof method for sculpting an elephant: "First, you get a huge block of granite; then you chip away everything that doesn't look like an elephant."