Eleven Jokes / Recent Jokes

The following is an excerpt from the July 1943 issue of Transportation Magazine. This was serious and written for male supervisors of women in the work force during World War II, a mere 58 years ago!

Obviously, the intent was not to be "funny," but by today's standards, this is hilarious!

Eleven Tips on Getting More Efficiency Out of Women Employees:

There's no longer any question whether transit companies should hire women for jobs formerly held by men. The draft and manpower shortage has settled that point. The important things now are to select the most efficient women available and how to use them to the best advantage.

Here are eleven helpful tips on the subject from Western Properties:

1. Pick young married women. They usually have more of a sense of responsibility than their unmarried sisters, they're less likely to be flirtatious, they need the work or they wouldn't be doing it, they still have the pep and more...

Santa Singh got up in the middle of the night to answer the telephone.
"Is this one one one one?", says the voice.
"No, this is eleven eleven."
"Are you sure it isn't one one one one?"
"No, this is eleven eleven."
"Well, wrong number. Sorry to have got you up on the middle of the night."
"That's all right, mister. I had to get up to answer the telephone anyway."

Jugnu singh got up in the middle of the night to answer the telephone. "is this one one one one?" says the voice. "no, this
Is eleven eleven." "are you sure it isn't one one one one?" "no, this is eleven eleven." "well, wrong number. I am harpal
Calling, sorry to have woken you up in the middle of the night." "that's all right, i had to get up to answer the telephone
Anyway."

A foreman sent out two groups of men to put up telephone poles along a new highway and asked them to report at the end of the day. The crews were gone all day and returned just as the sun was setting. The foreman asked the leader of the first group how many poles they had installed. The reply was eleven. The foreman patted the guy on the back and said, "Not bad." Then he went to the leader of the next group and asked him the same question. Two was the reply. "Two! All you installed were two?! The other group installed eleven!" The foreman exclaimed angrily. "Yeah," the leader answered, "But you should have seen how much they left sticking out!"

What do vampires have at eleven o'clock every day? A coffin break.

Why couldn't the Sardar write the number "eleven"?
He didn't know which "one" came first...

A kid goes up to his father and says, "Hey, Pop, know how old I am today?"His father says, "No...how old?"He says, "I'm eleven!"He goes into the kitchen and says to his grandmother, "Hey, Grandma, knowhow old I am today?"She says, "Come closer..."She unzips his jeans and reaches her thin, spotted arm down into hisunderwear. She fondles his genitals for a few minutes and then she says,"You're eleven."He says, "How could you tell?"She says, "I heard you tell your father."