Faithful Jokes

Three guys die and go to heaven.
The first guy goes up to St. Peter, who says, "In all the years you were married, were you ever unfaithful to your wife?"
The guy thinks a moment then says, "No. No. I was always faithful to her through 55 years of marriage."
St. Peter scratches something down in a big book, then he says to the guy, "OK, mister, you can have that Rolls Royce over there to drive around here."
Now second guy goes up to St. Peter. He asks him, "In all the years you were married, were you ever unfaithful to your wife?"
This second guy takes a moment. He hems and haws a few minutes, then he says, "Well, I did flirt a little, and there was that one night with Julia. But other than that I tried to remain faithful to my wife through 40 years of marriage. I guess I just wasn't perfect, huh?"
St. Peter scratches something in his book and says, "Don't worry about it. You can have that motorbike over more...

A community orchestra was plagued by attendance problems. Several musicians were absent at each rehearsal. As a matter of fact, every player in the orchestra had missed several rehearsals, except for one very faithful oboe player. Finally, as the dress rehearsal drew to a close, the conductor took a moment to thank the oboist for her faithful attendance. She, of course, humbly responded "It's the least I could do, since I won't be at the performance."

While going through his wife's dresser drawers, a farmer discovered
three soybeans and an envelope containing $30 in cash. The farmer
confronted his wife, and when asked about the curious items, she
confessed:
"Over the years, I haven't been completely faithful to you."
"When I did fool around, I put a soybean in the drawer to remind
myself of my indiscretion," she explained.
The farmer admitted that he had not always been faithful either,
and therefore, was inclined to forgive and forget a few moments of
weakness in his wife.
"I'm curious though," he said, "Where did the thirty dollars
come from?"
"Oh that, " his wife replied, "Well, when soybeans hit ten dollars
a bushel, I sold out!"
Tri Tran-Viet

Three men died and stood in front of God.
God asked the first if he had been faithful to his wife. He admitted to four affairs during his marriage. God gave him a compact car to drive in heaven.
The second man admitted to only two affair and was given a midsize car.
The third man was asked the same question and said that he had been faithful to his wife until the day he died. God praised him and gave him a big luxury car.
A week later the three guys met in a parking lot. The man driving the luxury car began to cry.
“What’s the matter? ”
“I just passed my wife, and she was on a skateboard! ”

A community orchestra was plagued by attendance problems. Several musicians were absent at each rehearsal. As a matter of fact, every player in the orchestra had missed several rehearsals, except for one very faithful oboe player.
Finally, as the dress rehearsal drew to a close, the conductor took a moment to thank the oboist for her faithful attendance. She, of course, humbly responded "It's the least I could do, since I won't be at the performance."