Fantasy Jokes / Recent Jokes

My roommate and I often play a game called "Fantasy Fist Fight." We got the idea from an episode of "Venture Bros." in which two of The Monarch's henchmen argue whether Lizzie Borden could beat up Anne Frank. To play, you choose anyone or anything: living, dead, real, not real, human, inhuman, and pit them against each other in a no-holds barred fight to the finish. Test your fantasy fist fight knowledge below!
1) Boba Fett Vs. Dog the Bounty Hunter
2) David Bowie Vs. The Marquis De Sade
3) Keith Moon Vs. The Loch Ness Monster (Moon gets a broadsword)


answers:
1) Boba Fett has a reputation for fighting to the finish, while Dog is older and would probably weaken first. Fett has galactic bounty hunter training while Dog only takes down fat polonesian dudes. Fett wins and Dog is brought to Cloud City in Carbonite.
2) Bowie holds up well for a while, but is ultimately overtaken by the Marquis' drive to kill Bowie and masturbate into more...

A Woman's Ultimate Fantasy... In a recent On-line poll 38, 562 men across the UK were asked to identify a woman's ultimate fantasy. 98. 8% of the respondents said that a woman's ultimate fantasy is to have two men at once. While this has been verified by a recent sociological study, it appears that most men do not realize that in this fantasy, one man is cooking and the other is cleaning.

Question: What is every Amish woman's private fantasy? Answer: Two Mennonite!

A Woman's Ultimate Fantasy...
In a recent On-line poll 38,562 men across the UK were asked to identify a woman's ultimate fantasy. 98.8% of the respondents said that a woman's ultimate fantasy is to have two men at once.
While this has been verified by a recent sociological study, it appears that most men do not realize that in this fantasy, one man is cooking and the other is cleaning.

A Woman's Ultimate Fantasy...In a recent On-line poll 38,562 men across the UK were asked to identify a woman's ultimate fantasy. 98.8% of the respondents said that a woman's ultimate fantasy is to have two men at once.While this has been verified by a recent sociological study, it appears that most men do not realize that in this fantasy, one man is cooking and the other is cleaning.

Fantasy Fist Fight- noun. 1. a fictional battle waged between two or more entities. these entities may be people (living, dead, or fictional), animals, deities, forces of nature, etc. 2. a game often played by adolescent males who are in dire need of female companionship.


Today's Fights:


1. Hugh Hefner Vs. Thousands of Bees (Hefner gets a pesticide gun):
One's every man's dream: rich, cool, and surrounded by beautiful women. The other's a swarm of deadly insects aiming to take him down. Has the founder of Playboy magazine finally met his match? To make things a little more even, we'll give Hef a gun that shoots a pesticide blend. It should take out about 50 bees per shot. But all the viagra and silicone in the world won't stop a tremendous swarm of killer bees (i think...). Fight ends with the bees delivering enough stings to Hefner's body that he is killed almost instantly. In his honor, his family begins the "Hugh Hefner Society to Test Bee more...

In a recent On-line poll 38,562 men across the UK were asked to identify a woman's ultimate fantasy. 98.8% of the respondents said that a woman's ultimate fantasy is to have two men at once.
While this has been verified by a recent sociological study, it appears that most men do not realize that in this fantasy, one man is cooking and the other is cleaning.