Fleas Jokes / Recent Jokes
These two fleas are sitting in Florida. One is shivering like crazy, saying "that has got to be the coldest ride I have ever had in my life!"
"How did you get here?" asks the other flea.
"I was in the moustache of some guy riding his motorcycle down the freeway."
"That is no way to travel to Florida" says the flea."Here is what you do. Go to the airport and find a lounge. Have a sip of someone's drink so you are relaxed. Find a really pretty girl and crawl up her leg and under her dress.G o inside her panties and you will find a nice warm place to curl up and fall asleep. The next thing you know, you are in Florida! Remember that for next time.We will get together next year and you can tell me how it went!"
The following year, the two fleas are back in Florida and the first
one is shivering like crazy. "That is the coldest f*%#in' ride to
Florida I have had in my life!!!"
"What happened to the more...
A professor places a flea on the tabke and orders it to jump.It does. He then cuts of its legs and repeats the command. The flea remains stationary.The professor then proclaims to his students... i have now proved that by cutting off a fleas legs the creature is rendered completely deaf!
A Friend's PrayerMay the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person whoscrews up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch. Amen
The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. Sunday, November 22, 1992Researchers at Cornell University recently patented an artificial dog that would speed up the breeding of fleas for lab use. Previously, the lab required 25 live, severely infected dogs to breed the 12, 000 fleas per day needed in studies of humans' and animals' allergic reactions to fleas.
Two fleas where running across the top of a cereal packet? "Why are we running so fast? " said oneBecause it says "Tear along the dotted line"