Foreman Jokes / Recent Jokes

After a two-week criminal trial in a very high profile bank robbery case, the judge turns to the jury foreman and asks, "Has the jury reached a verdict in this case?"
"Yes, we have, your honor," The foreman responded.
"Would you please pass it to me," The judge declared, as he motioned for the bailiff to retrieve the verdict slip from the foreman and deliver it to him.
After the judge reads the verdict himself, he delivers the verdict slip back to his bailiff to be returned to the foreman and instructs the foreman, "Please read your verdict to the court."
"We find the defendant Not Guilty of all four counts of bank robbery." stated the foreman. The family and friends of the defendant jump for joy at the verdict and hug each other as they shout expressions of divine gratitude.
The man's attorney turns to his client and asks, "So, what do you think about that?"
The defendant, with a bewildered look on more...

Paddy walks past a building site and sees a sign with LABOURERS WANTED on it so he go into the site office and says to the foreman oive come about the labourers job.
Foreman well Ive just got to give you a simple initiative test so can you give me a sentence with GREAT in it
After a short pause Paddy thinks about his donkey jacket that he always wears and says
well done you can have a start theres a shovel outside
That night Paddy sees his mate Murphy in the pub and tells him about his new job and all about the test and what to say.
SO nice and early monday morning Murphy is at the Foremans door asking about a job because he has taken a few more labourers on the test is a littel bit harder so he says to Murphy can you give me a sentence fascinate in it.
So Murphy recites and oiv got donkey oi tink its great.
The Foreman says NO a sentence with fascinate in it.
So Murphy again says oiv got donkey jacket oi tink its great.
NO NO NO! says the Foreman a more...

Soon after the Texas Aggie clocked in for work, the foreman called him over and told him that he had a phone call in the front office. When the Aggie returned, he had a mournful expression on his face and his head hung low. His foreman noticed and asked if he had received bad news.

"Shure was, Boss" he replied, "I just found out that my mother died earlier this morning.

"Gosh, that's awful," replied the foreman "Do you want the rest of the day off?"

"No," replied the Aggie. "I'll finish the day out."

About an hour later, the foreman returned to inform him that there was another phone call for him up front. This time when the Aggie returned he looked twice as glum and the foreman asked if everything was alright.

"Jezz, Boss this has to be the worst day of my life," Moaned the Aggie.
"That was my brother, and his mother died today too!"

Lemon Grove
A woman was applying for a job in a Florida lemon grove.
When the foreman looked over her application, he felt she was far too qualified for the job.
"Look, Miss Carter," said the foreman, "do you have any actual experience in picking lemons?"
"Oh, yes, I certainly do," she replied. "I've been divorced four times."

After a two-week criminal trial in a very high profile bank robbery case, the judge turns to the jury foreman and asks, "Has the jury reached a verdict in this case?"
"Yes, we have, your honor," The foreman responded.
"Would you please pass it to me," The judge declared, as he motioned for the bailiff to retrieve the verdict slip from the foreman and deliver it to him.
After the judge reads the verdict himself, he delivers the verdict slip back to his bailiff to be returned to the foreman and instructs the foreman, "Please read your verdict to the court."
"We find the defendant Not Guilty of all four counts of bank robbery." stated the foreman. The family and friends of the defendant jump for joy at the verdict and hug each other as they shout expressions of divine gratitude.
The man's attorney turns to his client and asks, "So, what do you think about that?"
The defendant, with a bewildered look more...

My Uncle Joe got fired from his construction job. I asked him what happened.
"You know what a foreman is?" he asked. "The one who stands around and watches the other men work."
"What's that got to do with it?" I asked.
"Well, he just got jealous of me," Uncle Joe explained. "Everyone thought I was the foreman."

An Italian, a Scotsman, and a Chinese fellow are hired at a construction site. The foreman points to a huge pile of sand and says to the Italian guy, "Youre in charge of sweeping." To the Scotsman, he says, "Youre in charge of shoveling." And to the Chinese guy, "Youre in charge of supplies."The foreman then shrugs his beefy shoulders and says, "Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you guys to make a good dent in that pile of sand by the time I get back."A few hours later when the foreman returns, he sees that the pile of sand is still untouched. Pointing to the pile of sand, the forman says to the Italian, "Why didnt you sweep any of it?"The Italian replies in a heavy accent, "I no gotta broom. You tella the Chinesea guy he inna charge of a supplies, but hea disappeara, and I coulda no finda him!"Then the foreman turns to the Scotsman and asks, " Didnt I tell you to shovel that sand?"The Scotsman more...