Frog Jokes / Recent Jokes
Why did the frog walk across the road?
He didn''t... he jumped.
Why did the frog cross the street?
Because the chicken crossed the road.
Why did the frog cross the road?
To see what the chicken was doing.
What do you call a frog with no legs?
It doesn''t matter- he won''t come anyway.
What did the frog order at McDonald''s?
French flies and a diet Croak
What''s red and green and goes 175 miles an hour?
A frog in a blender.
Why are frogs so happy?
They eat whatever bugs them!
A seven year old boy goes to the hospital with his grandmother to visit his grandfather.
When they arrive, Johnny runs ahead of his granny, and bursts into his grandfather's room.
"Grandpa", the boy says, "As soon as Grandma comes into the room, make the sounds of a frog,"
"What for?" asked his Grandpa.
"Grandma said that as soon as you croak, we're going to Disney World"
A little kid is walking down the footpath with a flat frog tied to a peice of string. He walks into the Brothel and walks to the front desk and says "i would like to have sex with your disesed woman please." the lady at the desk says "why do you want to do that?"
the boy said "if i have sex with her i will get the disease then i will go home and the baby sitter will have sex with me and when dad takes the baby sitter home hes going to bonk her brains out then when he comes back he will have sex with my mum and when dad goes to work in the morning mum will have sex with the milk man and i hope the milkman dies from that disease because he is the on who ran over my bloody frog!!!
Jesus and Saint Peter are golfing. St. Peter steps up to the tee on a par three and hits one long and straight. It reaches the green.
Jesus is up next. He slices it. It heads over the fence into traffic on an adjacent street. Bounces off a truck, onto the roof of a nearby shack and into the rain gutter, down the drain spout and onto a lilly pad at the edge of a lake. A frog jumps up and snatches the ball in his mouth. An eagle swoops down, grabs the frog. As the eagle flies over the green, the frog croaks and drops the ball. It’s in the hole.
Saint Peter looks at Jesus, exasperated. "Are you gonna play golf?" he asks "Or are you just gonna fuck around?"
A woman went into a pet shop to buy her husband a pet. After looking around she realized that all the pets there were very expensive. She went to the counter and questioned the clerk. "I wanted to buy my husband a pet, but all of yours are so expensive", she said.
"Well," said the clerk, "I have a huge bullfrog in the back for $50.00. Would you like to see it?"
"$50.00? For a Frog??" asked the woman.
The clerk said, "It's a special frog. It gives blow jobs." Well, the woman did not particularly enjoy giving head, so, she thought this was a heck of a deal. She'd get her husband a gift he'd surely enjoy, and she'd never have to do that again. The woman decided to buy the frog.
She took it home to her husband and explained the strange gift. Of course, the husband was a bit skeptical, but said for sure he'd try it out that night.
The woman went to bed that night relieved knowing she'd never have to give another blow more...
A young chap is walking down the street when he hears a girl's voice coming from the direction of the gutter. When he looks down he sees a frog.
The frog looks up at him and says "Good sir, I am a beautiful princess who has been trapped in the body of a frog by a wicked witch. If a young man kisses me I will turn back into a princess. If you kiss me and release me from my curse I'll do anything you desire."
The young chap considers this, picks the frog up and puts it in his pocket.
"Please help me!" says the frog. "Kiss me and I will do anything your heart desires. I will be yours until the end of time!"
The young man takes the frog out of his pocket and says "I'm afraid I'm a computer programmer so I haven't got time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog - now, that's cool."