Generation Jokes / Recent Jokes

A very self-important college freshman attending a recent football game, took it upon himself to explain to a senior citizen sitting next to him why it was impossible for the older generation to understand his generation.

"You grew up in a different world, actually an almost primitive one! ", the student said, loud enough for many of those nearby to hear.

"The young people of today grew up with television, jet planes, space travel, man walking on the moon, our spaceships have visited Mars. We have nuclear energy, electric and hydrogen cars, computers with DSL, BPS, light-speed processing. ... and..."

.. pausing to take another drink of beer.... The Senior took advantage of the break in the student's litany and said, "You're right, son. We didn't have those things when we were young, so we invented them. Now, you - arrogant little shit - what are you doing for the next generation?"

Little Johnny went running into the kitchen and said, "Oh, mommy, you know that beautiful vase in the living room that you said has been handed down from generation to generation?"
"Yes, dear," his mother replied, "what about it?"
"Well, the last generation just dropped it!" Little Johnny exclaimed.

Antiques are things one generation buys, the next generation gets rid off, and the following generation buys at auction at amazing prices.

Since 1-April-97, competition has been very keen in Singapore's cellular phone market due to the new entrant M1. Before that, there was only one operator, that's why no one covers more of Singapore than Singtel Mobile, absolutely no one. AMPS was the first system that Singtel launched, an Ageing Mobile Phone System. After that they realized that the system is outdated and they put up another system ETACS which the subscribers were not very happy about because it was Extremely Tough to Access Call System. Then came the 2nd generation cellular technologies, which Singtel was working with Ericsson to implement - GSM. After some time, Singtel found that things are Getting Slightly Messy, so they decided it was time to go into 3rd generation technology, PCN. However it is a very Poor Coverage Network and every time subscriber wants to make a call, they Phui Chao Nua because they can't get thru. So Singtel decides to rename PCN to the GSM1800 Network, or Get Some More Idiotic Bums Onto Our more...

"Mummy, Mummy!" called Little Johnny one day. "Do you know the beautiful vase in the dining room that's been handed down from generation to generation?""Yes", said his mother. "What about it?""Well the last generation just dropped it."

ADULTERY - The wrong people doing the right thing.

ALIMONY - The screwing you get for the screwing you got.

BABY - A hollow tube with a loud voice at one end and a complete lack of responsibility at the other end.

CANNIBAL - One who is apt to pass his best friend.

CHIVALRY - A mans inclination to defend a woman against every man but himself.

CONSCIENCE - That which hurts when everything else feels so good.

CONSTIPATION - To have and to hold.

COOKIE - A virgin doughnut.

DANCE - A Naval engagement without the loss of seamen.

DIVORCE - What happens when two people cannot stomach each other any longer.

DECOY - A flashlight in the pants pocket.

DIARY - Book of revelations.

DOCTOR - A lucky fellow who is privileged to undress women and go all over them without getting his face slapped.

ENEMA - A goose with a gush.

EXPLORATION - Beating more...

A very self-important college freshman attending a
recent football game, took it upon himself to
explain to a senior citizen sitting next to him why
it was impossible for the older generation to
understand his generation.
"You grew up in a different, actually almost
primitive, world," the student said, loud enough for
the whole crowd to hear. "The young people of today
grew up with television, jet planes, space travel,
man walking on the moon, our spaceships have visited
Mars... We even have nuclear energy, electric and
hydrogen cars, computers with light-speed processing
.... and,". pausing to take another drink of beer..
The Senior took advantage of the break in the
student's litany, and said, "You're right, Son. We
didn't have those things when we were young....... so
we invented them. Now, you arrogant little brat,
what are you doing for the next generation?"
I more...