Gentile Jokes

A couple just got married and on the night of their honeymoon before passionate love, the wife tells the husband, "Please be gentile, I'm still a virgin." The husband being shocked, replied, "How's this possible? You've been married three times before." The wife responds, "Well, my first husband was a gynecologist and all he wanted to do was look at it. My second husband was a psychiatrist and all he wanted to do was talk about it. Finally, my third husband was a stamp collector and all he wanted to do was... oh, do I miss him!"

A whole gaggle of Jewish ladies at a party were discussing the problemof one of their daughters, who looked very much as though she were planning to marry a Gentile boy. Everyone was disturbed about it, and Icould not help interrupting. "Why not?" said I. "Let her marry a Gentile boy. I'm all in favor ofJewish girls marrying Gentile boys." "Why?" chorused the women. And I said, "Because why should the Jewish boys have all the badluck?"

A Jewish family invited their gentile neighbors for holiday dinner.
The first course was set in front of them and the Jewish couple announced, "This is matzoh ball soup."
On seeing the 2 large matzoh balls in the soup, the Gentile man was hesitant to taste this strange looking brew. Gently, the Jewish couple pressed the Gentile man. "Just have a taste. If you don't like it, you don't have to finish it."
Finally he agrees. He digs his spoon in, first picking up a small piece of matzoh ball with some soup in the spoon, and tasting it gingerly. The usual "mmmmmmm" sound can be heard coming from somewhere deep in his chest, and he quickly finished the soup.
"That was delicious," he said. "Can you eat any other parts of the matzoh?"

Down in the workshop all the elves were makin' toys,
For the good Gentile girls and the good Gentile boys.
When the boss busted in, nearly scared' em half to death,
Had a rifle in his hands and cheap whiskey on his breath.

From his beard to his boots he was covered with ammo,
Like a big fat drunk disgruntled Yuletide Rambo.
And he smiled as he said with a twinkle in his eye,
"Merry Christmas to all- now you're all gonna DIE!"

The night Santa when crazy,
The night St. Nick went insane!
Realized he'd been getting' a raw deal,
Something finally must have snapped in his brain.

Well, the workshop is gone now, he decided to bomb it.
Everywhere you'll find pieces of Cupid and Comet.
And he tied up his helpers and he held the elves hostage,
And he ground up poor Rudolph into reindeer sausage.
He got Dancer and Prancer with an old German Luger,
And he slashed up Dasher just like more...