Gore Jokes / Recent Jokes
One time President CLINTON was put into a coma and Vice President GORE was put in charge.
The president finally woke up two years later. Then a nurse came over and asked him what he wanted now that he was up.
The President said "I really want a nice e hamburger, say how much they cost now?"
The nurse said "100 yen."
when all through Palm Beach.
Only lawyers were stirring, the blood sucking leech.
The ballots were held to the light with great care,
In hopes that a dot or a dimple'd be there.
The voters were nestled all snug in their beds,
while nightmares of hanging chads danced in their heads.
And Bush back in Austin, and Gore in DC,
Had just rattled the courts over votes absentee.
When out on the beach there arose such a clatter,
The counters stopped counting to see what's the matter.
Away to the shore lawyers flew like a flash,
The out of state protesters started to clash.
When what to our wondering eyes was bestowed,
But Air Force One and eight interns in tow.
What came off the plane gave us all quite a chill,
We knew in a moment ‘twas our buddy Bill.
More buxom than hookers, his courses they came,
And he whistled and shouted and called them by name.
Now Bambi, Now Suzie! Now Candy and Tasha!
On Cassie! On Dana! On more...
Al Gore was entertaining Joe Leiberman and decided to show off his new home. Upon entering the bedroom, Joe noticed a very large wooden box with 5 empty beer cans and about $1500. 00 in cash.
Out of curiosity, Joe asked "AL, I see you're a beer drinker, I am too! you see, we DO have something in common"
With a condescending voice, Al quipped, " yes, of course we do Joe"
Joe then asked " Al, why the 5 empty cans and all that cash"
Al gladly told Joe about his new program. " Joe, since last month, I have decided to turn a new leaf and become a more accountable person, while at the same time rewarding myself for my efforts. Whenever I tell a lie, I drink a beer and put the can in this box"
"That's really impressive", Joe replied, "only 5 beer cans in a whole month, but tell me, where did all that cash come from"?
Without missing a beat, Al responded, "Whenever the box gets full of beer cans, I more...
Clinton and Gore went to a diner to get a bite to eat.
A good looking waitress comes up and asks, "Can I take your order?"
Clinton says, "Yes, I like a quickie!"
She turns a little read and say, "Sir, in your present state of affairs I don't think you should even be suggesting something like that. I will come back when you are ready to order from the MENU!"
As she walks away Gore leans over and says, "Bill, its pronounced quiche".
Gore, Nader, and Bush are on an airplane. Nader throws $100 dollars in one-dollar bills off the plane. "I just made one hundred people happy!," he exclaims with pride.
George Bush throws $1,000,000 in one-dollar bills off the plane. "I just made one-million Americans happy," he boasts, turning to Gore.
Without hesitation, Gore picks Bush up and throws him off the plane. "I just made the world happy."
Clinton and Gore went to a diner to get a bite to eat.A good looking waitress comes up and asks, "Can I take your order?"Clinton says, "Yes, I like a quickie!"She turns a little read and say, "Sir, in your present state of affairs I don't think you should even be suggesting something like that. I will come back when you are ready to order from the MENU!"As she walks away Gore leans over and says, "Bill, its pronounced quiche".