Grandmother Jokes / Recent Jokes

Grandmother and granddaughter were in the bank when three bank robbers walked in and held it up.
"All the ladies down on the floor," one handsome robber commanded.
"My grandmother too?" the little girl asked. "Yes, your grandmother too!"
"All the ladies on the floor, pull up your dresses."
"My grandmother too?" "Yes, your grandmother too! All ladies will now remove their panties."
"Surely you don't mean my grandmother too?" asked the little girl.
Becoming angry, the handsome robber shouted, "YES, YOUR GRANDMOTHER TOO! Now, all the ladies on the floor are to spread their legs apart."
When the little girl started to ask if her grandmother was included, her grandmother snarled, "YOU HEARD WHAT THE MAN SAID!"

Grandmother and granddaughter were in the bank when three bank robbers walked in and held it up."All the ladies down on the floor," one handsome robber commanded."My grandmother too?" the little girl asked. "Yes, your grandmother too!""All the ladies on the floor, pull up your dresses.""My grandmother too?" "Yes, your grandmother too! All ladies will now remove their panties.""Surely you don't mean my grandmother too?" asked the little girl.Becoming angry, the handsome robber shouted, "YES, YOUR GRANDMOTHER TOO! Now, all the ladies on the floor are to spread their legs apart."When the little girl started to ask if her grandmother was included, her grandmother snarled, "YOU HEARD WHAT THE MAN SAID!"

One Christmas, a little Italian boy sits at his desk writing a Christmas list to Jesus. He first writes, "Dear baby Jesus. I have been a good boy mosta of the year so I want a new..." He looks at it, then crumples it up into a ball and throws it away. He gets out a new piece of paper and writes again, "Dear baby Jesus. I have been a good boy for the whole year so I want a new...." He again looks at it with disgust and throws it away. He then gets an idea. He goes into his mother's room, takes a statue of the Virgin Mary, puts it into the closet and locks the door. He takes another piece of paper and writes, "Dear baby Jesus. If you ever want to see your mother again...." Ethnic
Read the Signs "One Christmas, a parent decided that she was no longer going to remind her children of their thank-you note duties. As a result, their grandmother did not receive acknowledgments of the generous checks she had given.
However, things were different the more...

Ujaagar's eldest daughter had been taken to the delivery room in a hospital and he was anxiously waiting outside, when he heard the crying of a newborn babe. A few minutes later a nurse came out of the delivery room.
Ujaagar rushed up to her and enquired,' Sister, am I a grandfather or a grandmother?'

One Christmas, a parent decided that she was no longer going to remind her children of their thank-you note duties. As a result, their grandmother never received acknowledgments of the generous checks she had given.
However, things were different the following year.
"The children came over in person to thank me," the grandparent told a friend triumphantly.
"How wonderful!" the friend exclaimed. "What do you think caused the change in their behavior?"
"Oh, that's easy," the grandmother replied. "This year I didn't sign the checks."

A little girl was out with her Grandmother when they came across a couple of dogs mating on the sidewalk.
"What are they doing, Grandma?" asked the little girl.
The grandmother was embarrassed, so she said, "The dog on top has hurt his paw, and the one underneath is carrying him to the doctor."
"They're just like people, aren't they Grandma?"
"How do you mean?" asked the Grandma.
"Offer someone a helping hand," said the little girl, "and they screw you everytime!"

A woman took her 6-year-old daughter to pick out some fish at the pet store. While there, they walked past the caged cats, and little Emily got curious.
"Mommy, mommy! I wanna look at the kitties."
So they went over to them. Little Emily looked at each pair of cats in each cage, they were set up into pairs of cat species that got along with each other. Little Emily pointed at each cage and asked her mom what the name of each species was.
"Mommy, what's that?" she asked.
"Why, that's a Himalayan."
"What about THAT one?"
"That's a Persian."
And so it went on. When she reached the last cage, little Emily noticed that one of the cats was on top of each other. Pointing to the one on top, she asked "Mommy, what's that one?"
"A Tabby,"
"What are they doing?"
After thinking for a second, the mother said, "Well, they're mating."
A week later, little Emily's more...