Greg Jokes / Recent Jokes
(Hi guys, I received these jokes from a friend. May be a little outdated but still enjoyable.)
1) When Paula Barbieri signed up for MCI friends and family, what was the first number she gave?
- "911"
2) What was the best selling Halloween Costume the previuos year?
- An O. J. Simpson costume.
Why are stores refusing to carry it?
- They are always returned because the gloves don't fit.
3) Who's the dumbest person in America?
- OJ's next girlfriend!
4) The Florida Orange Growers Association has offered to pay all of OJ's legal bills on one
condition.
- He has to change his name to snapple.
5) Why did OJ's kids want to live with their dad?
- They knew they could get away with murder.
6) Where was Kato Kalin between 9 and 12?
- In the fourth grade.
7) What did Johnny Cochran say when accused of beating his wife?
- At least I didn't kill her like some people I know.
8) It seems that Bob more...
Knock Knock
Who's there!
Greg!
Greg who?
Greg Scott! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Greg!
Greg who?
Gregs of Wrath! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Greg!
Greg who?
Gregs balls of fire!
One day Greg went to the bathroom and he almost missed the toilet. So then I come in and see if he is okay. He says, "Yes and I missed the toilet." I said, "OMG you ***hole." "I am not an ***hole," said Greg. "My shit is up to my knees and it is really warm."
Greg lives above a bar, and one day he was walking up the stairs after losing his job. A man comes up to him and says, "You are looking really down. I know how to make you feel better. Watch this. I'll jump off the 4th story and be sucked in the 2nd."
He jumps off and was sucked in through the 2nd story window.
"Wow, that was cool, I'm gonna do it!" says Greg.
Greg jumps off the roof and landed hard on the ground, dead. The man who was safe in the 2nd story walked down to the bar and orders a drink.
The bartender says to him, "Superman, you shouldn't mess with people's minds like that."