Grenade Jokes / Recent Jokes

one day there was a war
Men vs women
Men got out bazookas and nukers
Women got out flowers
A blond man got a pistol
A blonde woman got a grenade
"NO," screamed the men, "YOU CANT USE A PISTOL IT'S TOO WEAK."
"NO," screamed the women, "YOU CANT USE A GRENADE, IT'S DANGEROUS."
The blond man shot a fat slow ugly lady.
The blonde woman blew up all the women cuz she didn't know how to use a grenade.

Al Davis had finally put together the perfect Oakland Raiders team for '98. The only thing he was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges, and even the high schools, and he couldn't find a quarterback that would ensure a SuperBowl win.
Then one night, watching CNN, he saw a war zone in Bosnia. In the background, out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a young Bosnian soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand grenade straight into a 15th story window 200 yards away! He threw another grenade into a group of about 10 soldiers a good 110 yards away! A car passes going 80 miles (120 km) an hour, and he send another grenade right into the barely open window. "I've got to get this guy," Al says to himself, "He has the perfect arm!"
So he brings him to the States and teaches him the game of football. Predictably, the young man breaks all the NFL records for completed passes, and the Raiders go on to win the SuperBowl.
The more...

Al Davis had put together the perfect Raiders team for '
96. The only Thing he was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges, and even the high schools, and he couldn't find a ringer quarterback that would ensure a Super Bowl win.
Then one night, while watching CNN, he saw a war zone in Bosnia. In the background, out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a young Bosnian soldier with a truly incredible arm. First, he threw a hand grenade straight into a 15th story window over 200 yards away -ka-boom! Next, he threw another hand grenade into a group of about 10 soldiers a good 110 yards away-ka-blooey!
Then, a car passes going 90 miles an hour- bulls-eye! Another grenade right into the barely open window.
"I've got to get this guy," Al says to himself. "He has the perfect arm!"
So he brings him to the states and teaches him the great game of football. Predictably, the young man breaks all NFL records for completed passes, more...

Al Davis had put together the perfect Raiders team for '96. The only Thing he was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges, and even the high schools, and he couldn't find a ringer quarterback that would ensure a Super Bowl win.
Then one night, while watching CNN, he saw a war zone in Bosnia. In the background, out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a young Bosnian soldier with a truly incredible arm. First, he threw a hand grenade straight into a 15th story window over 200 yards away -ka-boom! Next, he threw another hand grenade into a group of about 10 soldiers a good 110 yards away-ka-blooey!
Then, a car passes going 90 miles an hour- bulls-eye! Another grenade right into the barely open window.
"I've got to get this guy," Al says to himself. "He has the perfect arm!"
So he brings him to the states and teaches him the great game of football. Predictably, the young man breaks all NFL records for completed passes, accuracy more...

Al Davis had put together the perfect Raiders team for '96. The only Thing he was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges, and even the high schools, and he couldn't find a ringer quarterback that would ensure a Super Bowl win.Then one night, while watching CNN, he saw a war zone in Bosnia. In the background, out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a young Bosnian soldier with a truly incredible arm. First, he threw a hand grenade straight into a 15th story window over 200 yards away -ka-boom! Next, he threw another hand grenade into a group of about 10 soldiers a good 110 yards away-ka-blooey! Then, a car passes going 90 miles an hour- bulls-eye! Another grenade right into the barely open window."I've got to get this guy," Al says to himself. "He has the perfect arm!" So he brings him to the states and teaches him the great game of football. Predictably, the young man breaks all NFL records for completed passes, accuracy and touchdowns. more...

What do you do when a Blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

This works for any team:
Coach Andy Reid had put together the perfect Eagles team. The only thing he was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges, and even the high schools, but he couldn't find a ringer quarterback who could ensure a Super Bowl win.
Then one night, while watching CNN, he saw a war-zone scene in Bosnia. In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Bosnian soldier with a truly incredible arm.
He threw a hand grenade straight into a 15th-story window 200 yards away-ka-boom!
He threw another hand grenade into a group of 10 soldiers 100 yards away-ka-blooey! Then a car passed, going 90 mph - bulls-eye!
"I've got to get this guy!" Reid said to himself. "He has the perfect arm!"
So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of football, and the Eagles go on to win the Super Bowl for the first time in history.
The young Bosnian is lionized as the Great Hero of football, and more...