Grey Jokes / Recent Jokes

Whats grey and wrinkly and jumps every twenty seconds? An elephant with hiccups!

Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example.

Always listen to experts. They'll tell what can't be done and why. Then do it.

It takes two things to be a consultant - grey hair and hemorrhoids. The grey hair makes you look distinguished and the hemorrhoids make you look concerned.

In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.

An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less, until he knows absolutely everything about nothing.

To spot the expert, pick the one who predicts the job will take the longest and cost the most.

After all is said and done, a hell of a lot more is said than done.

If you consult enough experts, you can confirm any opinion.

Hiring consultants to conduct studies can be an excellent means of turning problems into gold, your problems into their gold.

Whats grey, beautiful and wears glass slippers? Cinderelephant!

Whats grey, stands in a river when it rains and doesnt get wet? An elephant with an umbrella!

Whats big and grey and lives in a lake in Scotland? The Loch Ness Elephant!

The following are supposedly true definitions, stories, and terms relating to the Civil War.

BIGGEST MAN… The biggest man in the Union Army was Capt. David Van Buskirk of the 27th Indiana Regiment who stood 6 feet 11 inches and weighed 380 pounds. He was captured in 1862 and was sent to a Richmond Prison where a Confederate entrepreneur put him on exhibit. Even Confederate President Jeff Davis came to see him and was astounded when the impish Van Buskirk claimed that back home in Bloomington Indiana, “when I was at the train station with my company, my six sisters came to say goodbye. As I was standing there, with my company, they all came up to me, leaned down and kissed me on top of the head. ”

LETTER HOME… A young soldier left home to join the army. He told his girl friend that he would write every day. After about six months, he received a letter from his girlfriend that she was marrying someone else. He wrote home to his family to find out who she more...

Grey hair is hereditary - you get it from your kids.